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Letters From Listeners

After Divorce, Don't Date
12/09/2013

Dear Dr. Laura,

After listening to you for 4-6 hours a day on podcast, it really hit me how bad my past mistakes were. I wanted to share an email I sent to my 23-year-old daughter today, hoping that someone would benefit from the horrible mistakes I made after divorcing my daughter's father. I can't change the past, but I hope this will touch the heart of a divorced parent so they don't make the same horrible mistakes I did. - Suzanne

Dear Beautiful Daughter,

I apologize that it took me so long to finally have this insight, but it's never too late to say... "I am sorry." I laid my head on the pillow last night and wept. I woke up and still felt just as sad. It finally hit me how bad my decisions were and how it affected you, ultimately. I know we kind of had this conversation a short time ago, that I ignored the signs and married badly. However, YOU were the true blessing out of that. What really hit me was the other huge mistakes I made following my divorce. If I could turn back the clock, I would have NEVER dated or re-married until you were 18. I put you through 2 divorces and ultimately moved away from you for a 3rd man!!!!!!!!! This is reprehensible to me now. As a mother, I owed you a childhood and a mommy. I failed at both when you were going through your childhood. This weighs so heavy on my heart and am in tears right now. I can not change the past, but I am thankful I have finally learned from my mistakes. Unfortunately, I am sure you still suffer from the damage this has caused you. This is the hardest part for me. But it is NOT about ME anymore. I deeply hurt you to the core and I own up to it. Some day, I hope you find peace. I love you enough to humble myself. I love you so very much.

Forever and ever,

Mommy

Tags: Abuse, Behavior, Choose Wisely-Treat Kindly, Dating, Divorce, Marriage, Parenting
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