You often warn young people of marrying too young. I have a couple of examples why it's a good idea to wait.
I had befriended a couple of these older women, they were both 26-years-old and had been married since their early twenties. I remember initially thinking they were mature, responsible women, who were adored by their husbands. I was also secretly jealous of my friends since their lives seemed a lot easier than mine; as a single, 23-year-old trying to find her way.
- One day the three of us went out to lunch. These two friends got excited when they discovered they had something in common: they hated having sex with their husbands! They both complained and giggled at the fact that they were bad wives. I immediately turned to them and said "If I was your husband, I would cheat on you!" They both laughed it off and insisted when I was married, I would understand. Fast forward 6 years later: they are both divorced. The reason? Both husbands cheated. Luckily no children were involved in either marriage.
- I am still close with one of the women. At 32-years-old, she has never had a job and is not doing anything to change that. It is as if she is going through her early 20's again. She's crying, scared and repeating "I don't know who I am or what kind of career I should choose?" It has been frustrating for me watch her cry and avoid entering the work force. But then I remind myself that I have 10 years' experience surviving on my own, while she has 6 months of surviving on alimony.
My jealousy has now completely evaporated for these women. Without realizing it, going out into the scary world paid off for me in the end. I have a career, as well as a man, who will swim through shark infested waters to bring me lemonade.
Thank you for all of your guidance through the years.
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