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Letters From Listeners

Home Life is Failing Boys
01/02/2014

Dr. Laura,

I have listened to you since I started college. You have taught me many valuable lessons and I now live the life I want for the rest of my life. It is not always perfect, but I am learning every day. Each day I wake up and think how I can value and appreciate the differences between my hubby and me! Thank you for that!

With that said, I am a teacher of 14 (now part-time) years and a mother of two very active boys, 6 and 4. They were even active in my tummy! My kick counts literally took 15 seconds each night. My husband and I knew we were in for it.

If I may say, it is not our schools that are failing our boys, it's their family lives at home. As a teacher, I offer active learning centers where my students can move, talk and express themselves. As teachers, we do everything we can to get our kiddos actively engaged in their education. My colleagues even taught me to have empty envelopes so that the boys in the classroom can "deliver" something to the office just to give them an opportunity to move. I believe now more than any other time in history, our boys have more opportunity to learn according to their needs.

However, our boys are being "feminized" at home! Boys now see two working parents and I truly think they are gender confused. Our children think the 50/50 rule is the norm. I don't know how and when it happened, but men are not taking (and women are not allowing or encouraging) men to TAKE their masculine roles. I teach my boys that although I'm their boss, dad is the "big boss" of the house and they always have to ask daddy to be excused from the table. My hubby takes the boys surfing and teaches them how to work on the boat. My boys see me at home cooking them hot meals at night and doing laundry, while they see Dad going to work and finishing projects around the house. We take time to thank Dad for providing us with the things we have. We appreciate the things he does as a daddy and things I do as a mommy.

Might I also add that moms today are treating their boys like girls. Our boys need the opportunity to run, get dirty, play tag, and skin their knees!!! Moms today are over "mommying" them and boys are learning to be over-sensitive and feminine. In order for children to learn, they must arrive at school with the proper foundations in place. Boys are missing out on opportunities to be boys at home. They are over scheduled. They do not get to play in the neighborhood and deal with the bully around the corner. Instead, boys now go on "playdates" and only run during sports practices. When they get home, they go right to the TV or computer. Boys need opportunities to fail so they may get back up and try again. I believe education is failing our boys because roles are confused at home. Let's let our boys be boys so they can grow up to be men!

Masculinity is an endangered species...keep fighting the good fight!

Meredith

Tags: Education, Parenting, Raising Boys to Men, Values
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