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Email of the Day

The 'Bonus' Child
11/07/2016

Dear Dr. Laura:

I am the child of parents who were 41 and 51 years old when I was born.  I'm the youngest of six (my oldest sibling is 18 years older than me).  When I was young, I lived through the fear of my parents dying, I lived through the embarrassment of being a fourth grader and people thinking my mother was my grandmother, since all the other parents were young.  I also lived through my parents' death when I was 39 years old.My mom died first, followed by my Dad.  He was ninety, so I was fortunate, since I would have been even younger if he hadn't made it to that age before he passed away.  

For these reasons, I always said I would be done with having babies by the time I was 30 (and I did), because I didn't think it was fair.  While I loved my parents, and I was considered their "bonus" child, since my Mom was on birth control at the time, their ages did affect me as a child.  

You are spot on with your concern about having children at an older age, and for taking the child's point of view.  I relate to that!  Those children would be living the life I lived, worrying about their parents all the time, and whether or not they would be around to see them grow up.  Thank you!

My kids' YOUNG Mom (even though they think I am old),

Barbara
Tags: Health, Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Relatives, Response to a Comment, Social Issues, Stress
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