Dr. Laura, America's #1 Relationship Talk Radio Host
On: SiriusXM Stars Channel 109
Call 1-800-DR LAURA (1-800-375-2872) 11am - 2pm PT
Image 01 Image 02
Email of the Day
Why We Didn't Shack Up Before Marriage
Why We Didn't Shack Up Before Marriage
06/07/2013

 

When my husband and I became engaged, we shared our news with everyone in our lives. People we knew who were happily married were excited for us.  However, our family and friends who were divorced, single or unhappily married were worried for us: "You're so young!" "You hardly know each other!" "You haven't even experienced life yet!"  None of these things was true, and I have to laugh at the last concern; isn't getting married about experiencing life "together"? 

One of the biggest worries we heard, however, was that we needed to try living together before we got married. The list of "what-ifs" was endless, but my husband-to-be and I knew we did not want to go down that path. When we made our commitment to be together, we wanted it to be binding, not some wishy-washy “trial period.” 

Well Dr. Laura, I am so glad we stuck to our guns because it has had a huge effect on our attitude toward each other. If we had decided to shack up together and see how things went, then I think we would have been watching for signs of trouble. I might have let it get to me he never puts his dirty clothes into the hamper, or he might have decided my habit of leaving boxes of feminine hygiene products on the sink was just more than he could handle. Instead, we made a commitment to one another. He is my husband and always will be and I love him, so I pick up his clothes every morning, because I'm his wife. I don't let it bother me because if dealing with dirty clothes or occasionally having to take the garbage out is the trade-off for having such an amazing husband, well then I happen to think I got pretty lucky. 

The difference between "let's see how this goes" and "let's make this work" is the difference between failure and success in a marriage. And for the record, as one of my co-workers predicted, I really do love being married. 

Bekky
Tags: choose wisely - treat kindly, Choose Wisely-Treat Kindly, Commitment, Family/Relationships - Family, Living together, Marriage, Relatives, Shacking Up, Shacking-Up, Wedding
PERMALINK | EMAIL | PRINT | RSS  Subscribe
< Back to Email of the Day Archives
Stay Connected
or connect at a place below
Normal Gear
Latest Poll
Would you like to hear the words "I love you" or see them through actions?
Hear
See
Archives  |  Results
Programs
About Dr. Laura
Letters
E-mail of the Day
From Listeners
Audio & Video
YouTube Videos
Stay at Home
Parenting
Relationships
Simple Savings
Work at Home
Tip of the Week
Subscription
Membership
Help & Support
Family Premium Help Center
Podcast Help
Contact Us
Legal
Terms of Use
© 2014 DrLaura.com. Take on the Day, LLC
Terms & Conditions  |  Privacy Policy
Powered By Nox Solutions