The Marine Corp and Faith Dear Dr. Laura, Thank you so much for your wisdom and the help you dispense everyday. I listen to you every chance I get and find that many of my friends do, too. I am the mother of a new Marine. My 19-year-old son just graduated from Marine Corp boot camp as Company Honor man. This is quite an accomplishment; he was the top recruit out of 450 other recruits. I was concerned about his choice to enlist, but wanted him to do what he felt God was calling him to do. He initially wanted to go to Annapolis, but decided the challenge of becoming a Marine was more compelling. This surprised me because he had difficulty obeying orders at home in a timely fashion. We always thought he marched to a different drum and his school career from kindergarten through graduation proved this to be true. (He was suspended from school 2-3 times a year in his first 3 years#151;K-3rd grade; then twice in Junior High). He felt led to test his teachers each year just to see who was in charge. Even though his behavior was questionable, he always maintained very good grades; all A#146;s and B#146;s. One of my major concerns when he enlisted was the effect the Marine Corp would have on his faith. Tim, my son, was raised in a Christian home and I was fearful that his faith might waiver during boot camp. Much to relief, his faith increased. The Corp stresses the importance of faith and values. The trying times Tim experienced as a recruit drew him closer to God. One Proud Mom, Nancy C. More >>

About Marines, From A Marine Dear Dr. Laura, In response to the woman who was concerned about her son joining the U.S. Marine Corps, and a few comments. First, of all the services in the U.S., the most closely bound to honor and faithfulness is the U.S. Marine Corps. Of all the services, the Marine Corps is the smallest, the only one with a hymm, the only one with a birthday, the only one with a commandant, and the very first armed service, November 10, 1775. The unique history and attitude of the Marine Corps makes all Marines very close, much like family, even across generations and many years after service. Among all veterans, more "old" former Marines say they would pick up a rifle and fight if their country called, then veterans of any other service. Second, in reference to killing, it is a terrible thing. Even when it is necessary, is repugnant, but can cause good to come into being. What kind of mother would hesitate to kill an attacker if it would save her child? Imagine how long a Marine would hesitate in capturing, wounding, or killing an enemy? That deadly act is committed to save the Marine's own life, to save the lives of other Marines and innocent people, and in defense of a mostly God fearing and lawful nation. Third, in the Marine Corps, everyone is a "Marine". From the newest "graduate" of boot camp to the Commandant, no matter the gender, age, race, or rank, we are all equally Marines. No WAGS, no WAFS, no WAVES. And in the Marine Corps: "All Marines to carry a rifle!" and everyone cleans up their own messes. Fourth, the confusion about marines. Most people are wholly confounded by Marines and the Marine Corps. Marines are not at all like the buffoonish caricatures on TV or in movies. Most Marines are fun, playful, eager, and trusting people. The insulting mischaracterizations showing Marines as yelling, shoving, snarling, mean-spirited, bullies is hideous payment for all the Marines who have served, been wounded, or died for our country. But then just think of what kind of people are usually found in the TV and movie business. Lastly, about fear and combat. Many people think that to get Marines to charge up hills into blaring machineguns, that they must be full of hate. In the past, in some societies, that method would work for a short time. But America is the land of the free, remember? Hear, hate won't work at all. The only way to get Marines to charge into the guns is by instilling a very very deep sense of value for life and liberty. Marines will answer the bugle's call to charge because of love of Corps, love of the people of America, and a sworn pledge of honor. Madam, your son could make no better choice than to apply to be tested in Marine Corps boot camps. And if he is found worthy of the title, he will be given the privilege to continue our history, as a U.S. Marine, for we are the few, the proud, and "rightly" so! Yours truly, formerly but forever: Sergeant Chip P. United States Marine Corps, 1971-1979, "Semper Fi" More >>

The Heart of A Marine Dear Dr. Laura: I was listening to your show today. A caller had an issue that she asked you to help her #147;cope#148; with. She was concerned because her 17 year old son who was going into Navy but decided to become a U.S. Marine instead. Before I make a comment that I feel would help the caller, I just want to give you a couple sentences of background. I served as a U.S. Marine from 1994 to 1998. I was 17 when I went to Boot Camp at Parris Island. Because I was a minor, my father had to sign his permission for me to go. Even though he himself was a Marine many years ago, he and my mother were against me becoming a Marine saying that it was #147;not in my nature.#148; All said and done, after many discussions, my father knew that there wasn#146;t any changing my mind and signed the papers. To this day, I am eternally grateful to him for doing so. A few weeks ago, I was talking with a friend about our Christian faith. She then asked me about my faith and being a Marine. She asked if I went to church while I was in and I replied, #147;every Sunday I could.#148; She was perplexed. She asked how could I go to church on Sunday and still wake up each day knowing that I may have to kill someone. #147;How does that work,#148; she asked. I said it was simple; we go to church to pray that the world stays at peace so we don#146;t have to kill anyone. I can understand the woman#146;s concern. My mother had the same concerns even though her husband was a former Marine (Vietnam), her eldest son was a soldier (Desert Shield/Storm), and her middle son was a Marine. Men and women in our armed services are not bloodthirsty warmongers (most of them at least). They are people just like the rest of us that for many reasons, college, opportunity, or love of country, have decided to face the chance war and serve. I agree with your comment that those in the military should learn to #147;kill the bad guys#148; and do it well. The thing I didn#146;t hear you mention is that they should do it with moral conviction in a sense that killing is only to rid this world of unnecessary evils, nothing else. They know that they love their God, mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, and others more than themselves. This love forces them to forget themselves in time of need and to do what needs to be done to protect those whom they love. They have visions of what it would be like if someone was pushing their mother around with the barrel of a rifle, or hitting their father with its butt. It is this selflessness that is poetic in itself and that says the person is not an emotionless killing machine, but rather a person that has so much love for others that he or she is willing to give up their own existence for them. Colin Powell said (paraphrasing) that, #147;#133;there is nothing stronger than the heart of a volunteer#133;#148; when talking about our present day armed forces. This strength is not only in the defense of their country, but also in their moral and religious beliefs. I would say to this lady not to look at her son#146;s desire to serve as a step away from his Christian faith, but rather a symbol of his faith and how much he loves his family. Family is one of the things that the Christian faith teaches us is sacred and worthy of defense. Sincerely, Adam H. Formerly, Sergeant, United States Marine Corps More >>

From a Sailor-To a Sailor, and Her Mother Re: The Caller Who's Daughter Wanted Out of The Military -- No One Had Her Values Dear Dr. Laura, Please forgive my long-windedness. I leave it to you to edit my fax as needed. I had so many thoughts about the #147;mother of the Navy Sailor,#148; and I couldn#146;t stop the rush of emotions and memories. There#146;s no #147;nice#148; way to say I think the daughter is full of crap. Perhaps she#146;s made it through boot camp only to find her particular job not to her liking, maybe she#146;s afraid of what our impending and continuing conflicts mean for her, maybe now she has a twinge of regret that she doesn#146;t have the #147;freedom#148; that other young people have to fritter away their time any way they please. All of these states of being are curable. Stop talking to people of similar discontent, look around you and find a mentor, use your free time to think of how you can be an example to those of your shipmates who may have attitudes that need adjusting! You couldn#146;t throw your neckerchief in the air on any military installation without hitting someone who will be happy to assist your attitude (my suggestion would be #147;8-count body builders#148;). Lest those listening think I am some super-motivated over achiever, I#146;ll make a guilty confession. Until 9/11 I was much less aware of what the average military person went through for my precious freedom. I too, took for granted how damn lucky I am, having been born in the USA. I#146;d say I#146;ve probably done 9/10 #147;stupid things#148; according to Dr. Laura, and my life is not one of saintly perfection now but that September Day, and the days and weeks that followed caused me to raise my right hand, and swear to uphold the Constitution and defend freedom and democracy. I am now a United States Sailor and I would give my life for my precious flag, and the freedom and opportunity it represents. I went in to the Navy knowing nothing that happened to me, could ever cause me to be sorry I#146;d volunteered, I#146;m that sure. I did boot camp at the age of 35. Perhaps that gave me additional motivation and perspective, I#146;ve had a significant amount of years to do what I wanted. Let me share a story of the kinds of people her age that I met. I will never, NEVER have a more meaningful church service than I had at boot camp, surrounded by hundreds of sailors-to-be, mostly young. My eyes filled with tears and I couldn#146;t swallow the huge lump in my throat as we all (of many different faiths) started to sing together. This girl is denying herself the pride she should rightfully own for serving. In giving up your own will, your fears, you#146;ll discover fulfillment. Sailor, I#146;m here to watch your back, are you going to keep your oath to watch you #147;shipmates?#148; *Dr. Laura, Please don#146;t use my name. I want no part of the focus to be on me, because the military IS FULL OF MOTIVATED PEOPLE! OOO-RAH!! More >>

Caller Who's Daughter in the Navy for 5 Months Wants Out#133;. I am the Chaplain of the Reception Battalion at Ft. Knox, KY. 13K recruits pass by me each year on their way to becoming Soldiers in the Army. If I had a nickel for every Private who said something similar to our young Sailor's 'lament'. . . FYI: The "Option" to leave the Navy (like the daughter wants to do) is NOT the prerogative of the Sailor! It is ONLY the prerogative of the Navy!! This is because Federal Law makes the daughter a Veteran at 180 days of service - with ALL the attendant rights and privileges! The Navy cannot simply 'take' that away without the 'Due Process of Law'. (THIS IS THE REAL ISSUE!) The Navy has already invested over $20K in this young Sailor - they have NO desire to throw that money away just because the daughter says: "I don't like it here". The #1 problem young Recruits have is: No Idea where they are Going in Life! No Plan! No Vision of their future, beyond tomorrow! They joined on a whim with the (unfounded) notion that: "if it doesn't work-out, I'll quit". The first thing our young Sailor needs is a Plan for her Life: GOALS (!) for - 10 yrs, 5 yrs, 3 yrs, and 1 1/2 yrs (In that order)! A Vision! An Attainable 'Dream'! MOM needs to confront these issues: Home-sickness (A BIG-BIG Issue!!!) Life Goals/Plan (or lack of) The Vision her Sailor is lacking. If our young Sailor will 'get it together' and seize her Dreams and Goals, she has the opportunity to join an elite group of men and women who have few 'equals' in all the world. Our young Sailor can learn, see, and do things beyond the realm of the imagination of 99% of her peers!! And, she can leave the Navy knowing that - however small -she made a real difference in our world! And, she is a better citizen for having served and sacrificed for the welfare of us all! It ALL boils down to Our Core Values: "LDRSHIP" (Leadership) Loyalty Duty Respect Selfless Service Honor Integrity (The HEART of it ALL!) Personal Courage Many will enter our Ranks without these Values. Those who are willing to live by them, may stay. All others will be summarily removed! Shalom! Chaplain D. 1st Armor Training Brigade More >>

Having A Family In The Military Dr. Laura, Recently, you had a military wife on your show that had an issue about her eldest son. I myself was in the military. I have been retired 3 years. My son went through the same situation, but fortunate for me I retired when he was 14. He is able to stay in one high school for all 4 years. But all of my movings for his first 14 years was hard. His best memories was my time in Georgia. When that mother asked for advice you said the right thing. There is no advice in that area. My wife and I tried many, many things to help my son when I was in California as a recruiter in the San Fernando Valley. My son has lousy memories of that move. I feel that mother's pain. But you are right there is no right advice in this area. Having a family in the military has to be for the strong-will, especially when you make it a career as I did. I am now a teacher in Long Beach teaching JROTC. Some of my older students who plan to join the military and asked what was like to be single and married in the military. I am up and honest with them. Being married is great and hard, but it is really hard on the children when they have to move every 3 years. I think the husband and wife, who make the military a career do not take in consideration how it affects the children. If I had to do it over again I still would join the Army, but would wait on the marriage or kids until I had like 5 years left to retire or at least retired by the time my oldest would be starting middle school. Thank you for taking the time to read. Please tell your son "thank you" for his service to this great nation of ours. I am sure you are proud, but nervous also. As myself I just have one son and he is now 17. Happy New Year and God Bless, P. P. H. Staff Sergeant, U.S. Army, Retired More >>

Military Has Standards About Drug Use -- With Good Reason! Dr. Laura, I was listening to your program and heard the advice and comments you gave a young woman who was upset because the US military would not allow her entry into an Officer Program because she was a recovering drug abuser and had been placed into a drug rehab program by her parents after she had dropped out of college due to her drug abuse. She had successfully completed the drug rehab and was back in college, but since her parents would not agree to paying the additional college fees required for her continued enrollment, she had taken out loans to pay for the tuition, and now wanted to join the military as an officer in order to pay for the them. Your comments to her both angered and insulted me, and probably every other military person who heard them. You advised the young woman that YOU saw no goodreason why the military would not forgive her past abuseand allow her to become an officer because she had turned her life around, and you also made the comment that drug abuse in the military was fairly wide spread. (My words not yours, but the idea you conveyed was the same) You seemed aghast that this woman could not be allowed to serve in the military because of her past drug abuse and offered the thought that YOU would hire her. If you have read this far, let me explain why your insensitive insulting, and ignorant remarks has so angered me. First off, there is drug abuse in the military. But in the 31 years I have been in the Marine Corps, I have seen it decline to a great degree to the point it is not the problem we once suffered through. We recruit from the general population, so there will always be a reflection of the problems associated with civilian society in our military, but this doesn't mean we can afford to allow people who have abused drugs in the past entry. There are standards, and with good reason. Our work ethic and decision making requirements at all levels in the military often are life/death related. We simply cannot afford the luxury of allowing a person who, in their earlier years that displayed such poor judgement to be allowed to impact the life or death situations we face in combat. Would you want YOUR precious son being led in combat or in any other environment by a leader who had a previous drug problem and had showed such poor disregard for herself and "doing the right thing," as you so often tout? This is why we have standards. Officers are held to a higher standard of conduct, just like police officers are, and rightly so. Your comments about YOUR perceived idea of the level of drug abuse in the current military shows the level of ignorance you have. I am a Marine Corps officer who just returned from a six month combat tour in Iraq. My mother was a WWII veteran an a Navy officer. My father is a Marino Corps combat veteran from WWII. My first cousinwas killed in Vietnam winning the bronze star for heroism in the army. My son is a US Marine having served one tour of combat in Iraq and will shortly leave for another. Your comments insulted ALL of them, and all of the fine young men and women now serving in support of the war on terrorism. You are wrong, you owe ALL of us and apology, and you need to educate yourself on the reasons why we do not allow former drug users with the degree of abuse of your caller, to join as enlisted personnel, and more importantly, serve as Officers with the "special trust and confidence" that each Officer's commission at every commissioned rank invokes. Your belief that the young woman who now wants to join the military should be allowed to do shows your level of naiveteacute;. To be sure there are military personnel who do abuse drugs, but to make a blanket statement about the military in general thatleaves your listeners with the idea we all use drugs, or a majoritydo, is irresponsible in the extreme. While I applaud this young woman's rehab success and your encouraging remarks to her, I want to point out that her primary motivation to join the military was not patriotism, devotion, selfless service, or any of the other more noble reasons that motivate our young people to join, but rather to just: "pay off my college loans." I am surprised you didn't pick up on this one aspect, as it so closely relates to your continued rhetoric about "doing the right thing", having purpose, integrity " etc., ad nauseum, that you spew forth over the airways to your listeners on a daily basis. You can hire her all you want, but then again, YOU won't be required to make life and death decisions and go to combat. As for me, I say: "Not in the military of my country." Thanks for listening, but I doubt you'll completely read this letter, apologize, or even address it on the air. Regardless, thanks for the opportunity to voice my comments. Semper Fidelia Oliver G. Colonel of Marines More >>

Speaking The Truth Dear Dr. Laura, Thank you for articulating with boldness, clarity and eloquence, your opinion about showing the video of the beheading of Neck Berg to some high school students. And thank you for having the courage of your convictions, especially when you know that stating such opinions will bring immediate and merciless retribution. Indeed, I already heard a talk show host attacking you last night. While claiming to want to protect our children, our society willingly subjects them to ever-increasing levels of violence, lewdness and perversion on TV and in the movies, thereby dulling their senses and rendering them vulnerable to real attack because they have lost the ability to perceive real danger. The proverbial frog-boiling-in-water syndrome. Paradoxically, the only thing from which our society seems willing to "shield" our children is the very thing they need in order to survive: TRUTH. Thank you for speaking the Truth, regardless of the personal consequences. Without it, no one can be safe. My prayers are with you Regards, Susan H More >>

Her Best Friend, Love Of Her Life, and Husband Dear Dr. Laura, I was just sitting here this morning thinking on the events of the week. The passing of such a great man as Ronald Reagan is truly sad. It broke my heart and will forever be etched in my mind the picture of Nancy Reagan leaning in and placing her head tenderly on the casket of her best friend, love of her life and husband. What a fantastic example she is to the American woman. She left a career to be the wife and mother of her kids, she was supportive and always put her husband's needs above her own, she protected Ronnie's schedule, and never once spoke a bad word in public about him. Can you imagine what our men could be and do if we, as women, could be that supportive of our men? Hmmmm...just a thought.... Us women type could change the world through our men! I know this sounds so unpopular with the women's movement. "Forget men, we can do it all by ourselves" As a result our kids are wacked, our men are lost and unloved and our world is hurting. Wouldn't it be awesome to have Nancy Reagan on your show (of course when things calm down for her) and hear some words of advise to us younger women on how to love their husbands. Nancy Reagan is an example and an encouragement that spurs me on to love my man more. My husband may never be the President or move and shake the world but I want to be that women who leans in and places her head on his casket and know that I did my best as a wife and mother. Heidi More >>

I Owe You An Apology Dear Dr. Laura, I recently heard that your son enlisted in the military. If that is true, I owe you an apology. Quite a while back, I was listening to your program, when I heard you ask a caller something to the effect of "If your son does not go (to serve in the war) who then will go?" At the time, I was angry at your response. I thought to myself "there is not a chance in h--- her child would ever serve in the military". My anger stemmed from the fact that my son is a US Marine, and was in combat and "at the tip of the spear" in the first few months of the current conflict in Iraq. Our family lost a lot of sleep. More to the point, it seems most of those who serve, come from families with lesser financial means, although this is not absolute. My family probably would be considered upper middle class. During WWII and Korea, people from all social and financial strata served. Admittedly, I say this as one who was from the Vietnam era and did not serve. I did not get called up and am not sure what I would have done if I did. I realize today the importance for all young people to give something back; perhaps service in the military perhaps in the peace corp. My son came back safely, as I pray the same for all those who serve. I do not believe this war to be a just conflict, however that is a different subject. Our people in uniform do as they are ordered. I wish your son well, and pray for his safety. Sincerely, Anthony More >>