May 7, 2010
Help - My House Is A Mess!
IconHelp - My House Is A Mess! Homebodies By Cheryl Gochnauer Cheryl@homebodies.org "Most people don't believe that with five childrenI am new to the SAH thing," says Mary Anne, an at-home mom from Riverdale, Maryland. "I worked because I thought I had to. My childrenrange in age from 17 years to 6 months old. I wentback to work when my youngest was 12 weeks old.I thought I could do this. I had a job I loved at my children's school. But from Day One I was miserable. My three-year-old cried for me all the time. My mother-in-law was wonderful about staying with the kids, but it was not the same. I quit work for good right before Thanksgiving 2003. It has been wonderful, but here is the problem. "You talk about getting the house clean, etc., butI cannot even get a shower everyday! My house isa disaster and I feel like a failure. My kids arehappy and they don't seem to notice the mess. Myhusband is wonderful and says that as long as thekids are fed and happy we can live with the mess.Now when I say mess, I mean clutter. I can washthe dishes and keep the floors clean etc, butstuff just piles up. Maybe because I spend somuch time with the kids? I don't want to notspend time with them, and my three-year-old islearning to clean up his toys and loves to helpwith laundry. "I just need some encouragement that I am on theright track. Thanks for listening." - Mary Anne Hi, Mary Anne - There is no "right" way to keep house, so throwthe Suzie Homemaker mantle off your back! I seefrom your email that you have a three-year-old anda six-month-old. With only these two kids, yourhome would never be neat. Add three more plus ahusband, and you can see why everything's socluttered. Erma Bombeck did a lot of writing about this sortof thing. I remember one column in particularwhere she talked about how she used to yell at herkids for trashing the place. But when they weregone, she would have given anything for a pair ofsneakers on the stairs for her to trip over. Also, you have the approval of the one personwhose opinion means the most: your husband. Ifhe's okay with the clutter, don't worry about it.(Sounds like he's got his priorities straight!) My girls are now 11 and 15, and our house isneater than it's ever been (except for theirrooms, of course). That's because they're oldenough to help me pick up everything. We often do10-minute blitzes where we run from room to roomand tidy up. I know you've got older kids, too,but as you know, until the babies hit school-ageor so, they'll still be totaling the area foreverybody. You, too, will someday have a neat house. Butdon't stress out about it now. Concentrate onbuilding clean characters more than a clean house. - Cheryl Comments? Write Cheryl@homebodies.org . If you'dlike to get an autographed copy of Cheryl's "Stay-at-Home Handbook," visit http://www.gospelcom.net/homebodies/bookstore/orderSAHH.php Copyright 2004 Cheryl Gochnauer. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com.

Posted by Staff at 1:59 AM