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Subject: |
Advice To A Friend Who Is Missing Out On Life |
| Date: |
2009-09-29
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Advice To A Friend Who Is Missing Out On Life
Dr. Laura,
I have listened to you for a long time. This message came from a friend who is worrying and missing life. (I have a serious cancer, and so does her husband.)
Hi your surgery success is the highlight of my month for certain...it has been a tough one.
We have the stress of the store failing and losing half our income. My husband's PSA is moving back up and he will go back on some therapy soon, I am battling an unknown issue bladder, kidney, ovary???? It is now painful and we went to the Urologist Doc yesterday...I am scheduled for a series of tests, cancer scans etc. for the next 3 weeks...trying to get in for a pelvic ultrasound hopefully by tomorrow. The icing, which topped the week's events came this morning in an email from my little sister and only family, in Argentina...she has just been diagnosed with a brain tumor.
Golly, this sounds like a bad pity party novel...I also had a close friend my age die Monday from a flesh eating bacteria.... they amputated her leg but it had gone to her kidneys and she only lasted hours. Her memorial is Saturday.
Ok my Godly friend, put some perspective on this for me...I am talking to God and trying to understand, I keep telling myself this is "just life".
My answer:
Ok, this is easy, no kidding. You are trying to enjoy a teeter-totter all by yourself. Which half of the glass of water was the good half again? What are you doing looking at all these tomorrow issues and not looking at today? Even if you fall off a cliff, it is really cool on the way down! Go look outside and tell me what would make whatever you are looking at, a tree, a scene, a sky, truly any better? I know, if you didn't have these issues, they would be more beautiful. Well, no they wouldn't, they would look the same. It is us that obscures the beauty.
I am not going to tell you these are not big deals, they are. So was paying the business bills, so were the kid battles, and so on... Life is full and we want it to be just right, me too. I have cancer, I don't want cancer, I really don't and don't want to die. I am just NOT going there and I have a lot to do with how I will live my life. I am not going to hide from my trials, they we keep finding me. I have to face them (here comes the important part) when it is THE TIME to do so. I am having a wonderful day and looking out at our backyard living space and I see nothing but trees and flowers and pool and fireplace and sky. I can curl up in a ball and panic about what is coming or what might be coming. That's like washing the plate with all the nice freshly cooked food still on it, not smart.
Life is what happens while we are making other plans.
So, go sit by your man and look at the beauty all around you and don't miss it. Enjoy his love and let tomorrow come when it does.
J.
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