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Letters From Listeners
Paying Attention to my Husband Changed Our Marriage
Paying Attention to my Husband Changed Our Marriage
11/10/2011

Dr. Laura,

Your caller has inspired me to write this email to you. She mentioned her husband was been having an emotional affair with his co-worker.

Four years ago, I too experienced that. I was running two restaurants, putting in crazy hours to bring home the money for "our" future. Meanwhile, my husband met a person and was seeing her while I was working, talking to her and texting her. When I found out what he was doing, I was so upset and felt so betrayed. All I wanted was a divorce...after all, I was working so hard for our future.

After realizing I had been neglecting him, this is what changed me from wanting to get divorce to wanting to stay married to him...a daily devotion of thankfulness  I started making a list of 5 things he was doing I was thankful for. It was just simple things such as how he acknowledged me as I walked into the room, how he threw out the trash, how he washed the dishes, etc... And whether he listened to me or not, I would read it out loud at the end of the night to him.

Soon, I was thankful for the smallest things that he did and in return, he wanted to do more things for me so I would recognize his work.

Now four years later, as we celebrate our 8th wedding anniversary, I am so thankful we are still married. We now have a beautiful 2 year old and another daughter on our way. I hope all wives take a moment to thank their husbands for the small things they do.  I am sure their husbands will want to do more for them.

J.

Tags: Attitude, Behavior, Marriage, Respect, Thankful, Values
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