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Email of the Day

The Change Started with Me
09/09/2014

Hi, Dr. Laura, 

I have been married for 10 years and have two little girls that are my world. When I got married I was only 18 years old. My mother-in-law and I did not get along very well. I felt like she didn't care for me all that much because I was taking her son away. This made me act out towards her and not be a very nice person. 

Two years after we married, we had our first daughter. I realized then that not only was she my little girl, she was also my mother-in-law's first grandchild. 

As a young mother, I felt like I had a lot to prove. I wanted to be someone my daughter could look up to. I was listening to your show and heard you talking to a caller about what she was doing wrong in her relationship and what she could change. Even though you were talking about a spouse, I thought about my relationship with my mother-in-law and something clicked. I knew I had to make a change in myself and make more of an effort with her. I started doing more things to include her and make her feel like part of our new little family rather than keeping her on the outside. It didn't happen all at once, but the more I tried, and the more effort I put in, the closer we got. Also the more I tried, the more she tried. We are now closer than ever. I love her like a mother and could not ask for a better grandmother for my children. If I would not have heard you on the show that day, I don't know if our relationship would have changed or not. I hate to think about the relationship I would have missed out on if I did not make a change in myself. Even worse, I could have been keeping my children from the love of their grandmother. I hate that it took me two years to realize what a wonderful person she is. 

How amazing is it that the change really did start with me. 

Thank you for all your guidance, 

Maggie

Tags: Attitude, Behavior, In-Laws, Parenting, Relatives
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