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Dr. Laura Blog
When Children Have Children
05/13/2010
IconThe teen pregnancy rate is up for the first time since 1991, according to a report released by the National Institutes of Health, and is a cause for concern. "This is one of the key indicators for the health of the teen population," said Edward Sondik, Director of the National Center for Health Statistics. "Not only does this affect teen health at this point, but their health and well being for the next 20 to 40 years, as well as the health and well-being of their children." This is one of the most self-centered actions a female can take.  It is obviously not in the best interest of a child to be robbed of a father, a two-parent home, and a committed relationship which would give the child the security and role-modeling he or she needs to fulfill hopes and plans for a loving, secure marital future.It's very "in" lately to be a pregnant Hollywood star, and lots of money is offered for exclusive pictures of the heirs to celebrity notoriety or fame.  It doesn't seem to matter if the star is married or not - there is no judgment, no condemnation, no "clucking," no criticism, no shame, and no consequences.  It is just all "okay." When people do the wrong thing, repent, and then do the right thing, you'd think that they would be idolized.  Nope.  The media tends to humiliate and denounce them as hypocrites.  So, the "act" is irrelevant; the only thing that is relevant in current day society is that you must never say that anything is "wrong."  If you do dare to call anything "wrong," then you will be attacked. But back to the children.  Children having children is in no way a positive thing for either child.  There is sufficient research and practical experience to confirm the problems encountered by children without an intact family.  Why is this ignored?  Why is this denigrated or dismissed?  Why doesn't anybody care about the children?  Why is it all about how the female "feels" - which, I'm sure, isn't too great, once the reality sinks in that caring for an infant involves a lot of sacrifice and stress.Kids have very little to connect to these days.  That might sound like an odd comment considering all the means of communication available:  email, text messages, cell phones, and Internet social networking sites, but paradoxically, as the number of technological advances continues to grow, the sense of truly being bonded and connected one-on-one in the non-virtual space continues to diminish...significantly.  When one has a site with 200 "friends," one really doesn't have a true friend.With parents not around to connect with kids because of busy careers or divorce, or because they're shacking up or never got married, having a baby of one's own seems like an obvious way for a kid to get attention, bond to someone, and have some "hands-on" love.  Unfortunately, it doesn't play out that way as the child-mothers discover that children are seriously dependent beings.I remember when actresses like Ingrid Bergman (who left her husband and child to go to Europe to have an affair with one of her directors) were shunned from Hollywood for such behavior,  Now, having affairs, abandoning children, and giving birth out-of-wedlock are met with magazine covers and more job offers based on increased visibility.When children have children, it's largely because nobody is taking care of them; they're lonely and lost.  But we should never point a finger or suggest fault - after all, someone's feelings might be hurt!  And we all know that "feelings" are the most important value - right?  Dead wrong.
Tags: Family/Relationships - Children, Family/Relationships - Teens, Motherhood-Fatherhood, Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Pregnancy, Social Issues, Teens, Values
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