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Men's Point of View
Tags: Family/Relationships - TeensFather's DayMen's Point of ViewMotherhood-FatherhoodParentingSexTeens
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05/13/2010
IconA news headline from last week that said "Power Move By Male Students Ruffles University of Chicago" caught my eye.' It seems a group of University of Chicago students think it's time the campus focused more on its men.' The Chicago Tribune reports: "A third year student from Lake Bluff has formed Men In Power, a student organization that promises to help men get ahead professionally.' But the group's emergence has been controversial, with some critics charging that its premise is misogynistic." That is purely laughable.Recent job losses hit men harder - women earn far more bachelor's and Master's degrees than men.' There is a huge imbalance in government and private initiatives that advance the interest of women and girls (often to the direct detriment of men), like Title IX, which eliminates men's school sports when there aren't enough women interested in having a women's team of the same sport.The University of Chicago has nine women's advocacy groups on campus.' This group would be the first male advocacy group - and it welcomes women!' Get a feminist group to do the same - HA!' The group would host pre-professional groups in law, medicine and business, foster ties with alumni, bring speakers in to discuss masculinity, and mentor local middle school students as part of its "Little Men in Power" initiative.I read most of the 1,440 or so comments that followed this article in the Chicago Tribune , and saw exactly what I expected:' paranoid, hate-filled rhetoric, demeaning and dismissing men and masculinity, with no compassion whatsoever for what men have to confront in contemporary society (which is "angry minority orientation against the male - especially the white male.").' It should be noted here that this organization is pulling in men regardless of ethnicity, religion, or sexual persuasion.' It is just about men.' It's not about forming small, angry little groups that demand entitlement.' This is a group helping men succeed and regain a respect for their masculinity - something current culture and feminism has worked double time to destroy.You go, guys! More >>

Tags: EducationMen's Point of View
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05/13/2010
IconLately I have chastised a number of male callers for being "wussy." This label is often pinned on their wilted chests after I give some great advice which requires them to actually stand up at home and proclaim: "I am a man - not an animal!"...oh wait, that's from the movie "Elephant Man." Well, basically the problem is that most men today are afraid of their women.' Their wives can nag them into a grave and or cut 'em off from any affection, attention, appreciation and sex.' That's pretty powerful stuff.' And then women wonder why they don't have passion and respect for their men.I asked aloud on my radio program for men to tell me why they've cut off their own "giblets" by not taking care of business at home, even if their wives disagree with stuff that should be common sense (like the case of a 12 year old girl, who was wearing a thong and a short skirt which started and ended at her pubic area).Neil, a listener, sent this answer: "As a faithful listener and devotee of your program, I have heard you scold men for being afraid of the wives/women, instructing them to act like or be a man. As a man, I heartily applaud your directives and only wish it were that easy - to simply snap out of a momentary distraction or passing lack of strength.' Sadly and scarily, it is far from a mere lapse of attention or fortitude - we are in a veritable struggle for our male lives against an angry, entitled and politicized culture that belittles the role of fathers (sperm banks and single motherhood), demands equality just for starters and purveys an attitude of supremacy in schools (where two-thirds of today's college grads are females), the workplace and at home. "If only it were a matter of putting our collective foot down and simply demand respect, most of us men, husbands and fathers, would gladly oblige...stepping up to the plate to shoulder our responsibilities to protect and provide and lead - as we always have.'''"But when you're fighting with one arm tied behind your back, skating on a sheet of ice as the rules continually change without notice, there's little chance of success. "So, we back off, uncertain even of what it means to be a man; confused about what is expected, further unsure about what we will be allowed to do.' And, while I pity the beaten man today, I fear even more for the women, families and societies of tomorrow, who will bear the consequences of all of this misguided anti-male/masculinity behavior today." I second his concern. More >>

Tags: Internet-MediaInternet/MediaMarriageMen's Point of ViewSocial IssuesValues
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05/13/2010
IconThis is from one of my listeners (whose name is not given in order to protect her privacy): I've been hearing a lot lately about egg donations, surrogacy, and intentional single mothers, and I don't know if you were aware that it had gone this far!' Don't get me wrong, egg donation put me through school with no debt.' Over the past 4 years, I have donated my eggs to 4 different families, going through a total of 7 different surgeries in order to do so.' I know that at least 3 of these donations resulted in the birth of a child that was a miracle and a dream come true for the parents of these children, and I am grateful to have taken part in this dream. Recently, my agency contacted me again.' They had another donation for me.' I was thrilled because my husband and I are planning on starting our own family, and we were going to start trying in the next few months.' The donation would end in $10,000 in our pockets, which I thought would be a nice little nest egg or college account for the child we are planning.' Well, the agency sent over the contracts for me to sign, and luckily, I read them thoroughly.' The recipient was not the expected married couple with unfortunate infertility problems, but a single woman who, after having conquered the corporate world, realized it was too late to get married and make a baby on her own!' My heart sunk.' How could I intentionally give life to a child knowing it would not have a father? Then the thought crept in:' this woman is going to do it anyway, so I might as well be the one to profit from it, right?' As I was talking to my husband about my concerns, I realized, 'How can I donate part of myself to this woman and still expect my husband to believe that I think he is an asset to raising our children? How can I force another baby to grow up in daycare with no masculine influence, and still show my husband that he is a hero for wanting me to stay home with our kids while he supports us?'' I couldn't. I let the agency know:' I will not be available to do this donation, as I believe a child deserves both a mother and a father.' And I hope that my "passing" on the opportunity will make the potential "mother" reconsider her options and buy a puppy.' I may have lost ten thousand dollars, but as my husband said, I still have my morals, and that's worth more to our children than a college account. More >>

Tags: FamilyFamily/Relationships - ChildrenFamily/Relationships - FamilyMen's Point of ViewParentingRelationshipsRelatives
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05/13/2010
IconPhilosophers throughout the ages have contemplated and agonized over what causes people to fall in love.' Sociologists and psychologists have done the same over what causes people to stay in love.' Now neuroscientists are trying to solve both their problems by taking brain scans of folks in love looking for the "cause" of love.The report of their work prepared by the Wall Street Journal (2/8/08) seems to miss the main point.' Looking for brain sites of increased activity in people who after many years of marriage still feel fabulously in love, is not likely due to some abnormal hyperactivity in centers associated with affection or pleasure.' It is the opposite way around.' People who behave consistently in a loving manner constantly stoke the fires of affectionate and passionate love - all which will show up in their brain scans.The couple they "analyzed," the Turners, are described up front: "Ann Tucker is pushing a shopping cart through the produce section of a supermarket in Plainview, N.Y., when she turns to kiss her husband.' The supermarket kiss is a regular ritual for the Tuckers.' So are the restaurant kiss and the traffic-light kiss.' 'I guess we do kiss a lot,' says Mrs. Tucker...Mrs. Tucker is living happily ever after, and scientists are curious why." Why?' That's easy: she and her husband constantly behave like people in love.' Feelings follow behavior and both feed into brain pathways that become "well-worn" through constant activation.So, stop looking for supplements, hormone injections, or implanted brain stimulators, miracles or moonspots.' Instead, behave like a man/woman in love and you'll create what you wish for. More >>

Tags: CharityInternet-MediaInternet/MediaMen's Point of ViewPersonal ResponsibilityStay-at-Home MomValuesWomen's Point of View
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05/13/2010
IconI sometimes hear from people who think I'm too harsh on my callers.' There are many reasons for the way I deal with someone who calls my program, but my particular approach is always in direct response to what I intuit from the callers themselves.'' Here's an email I got from Morgan, who titled her correspondence "Thanks For Your Advice and for TEARING Into Me!" I called you the other day, and was shocked to hear you for real in my ear!' My question was about why I was complaining about my fianc' a lot lately.' My complaints were about his extra weight, being quiet on road trips, an, lately, his constant wearing of a baseball hat!' You listened PATIENTLY to what I was nagging about, and then you truly laid into me...and well, I really needed it! You told me that I wasn't marrying myself, and if I wanted to be with someone exactly like me, well, marry myself (ha!), but not stay and complain.' You also stated that I was comparing him to me, and that wasn't helpful.' He is his own man - a quiet, baseball hat-wearing man.' Then you said that I should thank him for putting up with me for so long. It is really interesting to me that I have always prided myself on treating others the way I wish to be treated-- my students, my colleagues, my friend--but that I had been treating my own fianc' in a negative, terrible and condescending manner, instead of thanking him every day for coming into my life.' He is the most gentle, generous and loyal person I know, and the truth is I have been feeling crappy about myself and projecting that onto him. Well, I went home and re-read "Ten Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives," and got to the part that asks the reader to think about whether they would want their future daughter to be dating their partner.' It really sunk in.I'd love it if my future daughter would be dating someone like my fianc', but I don't think I'd want my future son dating someone like I have been lately! Good wake-up call for me, Dr. Laura.' I've listened to you for eight years.' You are a true voice of reason, morality, and plain common sense in my head! More >>

Tags: CharityDatingInternet-MediaInternet/MediaMarriageMen's Point of ViewValuesWomen's Point of View
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