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IconI love "Law & Order" and "Cold Case" types of programs, because of the cleverness of the characters in discerning truth from lies (either from witnesses or clues at a crime scene).' I find it fascinating.' Detective Goren from "Law & Order: Criminal Intent" seems to know everything about just everything, which is a plot device that sometimes strains credulity, but, in general, I find the most interesting leaps to be that of a "gut feeling" or a "hunch" which is not easily explained by logic until after the fact.Some people are better at this than others - perhaps it's an inner talent that is unique, or maybe that individual just pays more attention to detail, or maybe it's just the willingness to listen to that still, soft voice that tells you something just isn't right.I find that many people who call my radio program with concerns about the behaviors of someone they're dating already "knew" on some level that something just wasn't right.' But they ignored or denied those feelings because they wanted the fantasy to be true.' Generally, these desired fantasies turn into disasters.One caller earlier this week met a guy online who immediately treated her like he was her fairy godmother.' "Zap" with his wand, and they were off to foreign lands for lunch and distant places for vacations.' She found out that he was still married, even though he had said he was divorced.' She called me all upset and sad.I told her that she had behaved like a slut (yeah, I said that), because he had money.' Certainly, she couldn't have believed that he loved her - he didn't even KNOW her! She was gullible and pretty and sexually available and that was what he was looking for.' He wasn't looking for the love of his life.' She, however, wanted the princess fairy tale, and she had it for two months.' Meanwhile, she had suspended her good sense about why a man would operate like this with no real knowledge of the woman.' Answer?' Knowledge of the woman was not of interest to him.' Showing off and having passionate sex with a very willing woman was what he really wanted.Instead of worrying about not being able to trust men, and sobbing with great hurt at being dumped, I suggested that she start behaving like the kind of woman a real man without a selfish agenda would value.' She didn't listen to that small voice, and ended up used and humiliated.'Don't deny what you know in your gut, even in the midst of what seems like the most unbelievable reality.' It is unbelievable, because it is not to be believed. More >>

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IconThe most important part of having "rights" is taking "responsibility" for those rights.' This is a concept many activist groups don't "get," as evidenced by their angry utterances and actions.' For these people (feminists, for example), their actions are irrelevant - they believe they should be able to say and do whatever they please.' It's the other people who have to toe the line.Here's an example:' colleges in the Indian state of Uttar Pradesh said that female students would be banned from wearing jeans and other "western" clothes in order to halt sexual harassment by male classmates. "Girls who choose to wear jeans will be expelled from the college," Meeta Jamal, principal of the Dayanand girls' college in Kanpur city told Agence France-Presse (AFP). "This will be the only way to stop crime against women." Okay - so, jeans, shorts, tight blouses and mini-skirts on campus are being banned in a growing number of their colleges in an attempt to crack down on "EVE-teasing" (as sexual harassment is known in India).' But, of course, these "oh so mature" and wise girls between the ages of 17 and 20 say that these rules punish innocent females rather than tackling the men who talk "smack" to them..Let's look at this in a very pragmatic way.' Two girls are walking down the street, passing a group of young men.' Each girl is on the opposite side of the street.' One girl has on a tight-cropped top and low-cut jeans.' The girl on the other side of the street is wearing a pretty, but modest, dress.' Which side of the street are the guys going to pay attention to?' Which girl are they going to approach?' Which girl are they going to "tease" to see if they can "hook up?"' The answer is easy.Which girl is showing off her "wares?"' Which girl is acting in a provocative manner?' Which girl is using clothing and body language to possibly advertise her, ahem, "social" availability?' Which girl looks as though sex is on her mind?' The answer is easy.It is completely unreasonable for a provocatively-dressed woman to get any when guys hoot and whistle.' If clothing is just another form of "self-expression," well, we all know what sexy clothes are expressing.' Modest clothes are expressing nothing close to a "come-hither" attitude.A female at work has her boobs popping out of her top and a fellow worker says "nice boobs."' He's considered "bad," but she isn't?' Isn't foisting your sexuality on someone else harassment?' Women can provoke men, but men can't react?' That is the silly thinking of most feminists.Young men in a classroom can't pay attention to the blackboard and the teacher's words when he has in front of him the sight of a girl's lower back and upper butt, because she's wearing very low cut jeans.' Young men on a campus can't even remember which building to go into when a young woman walks by with her soft belly jutting out beneath her short top over her low-cut jeans.This is where responsibility comes in.' If you don't want that kind of attention, don't invite it! When I read the many of the comments posted in response to this story on Breitbart.com , I was not surprised at the naive and utterly stupid remarks about women having their rights to dress and behave any way they want (i.e., no responsibility), and men should control their verbal and emotional reactions (i.e., responsibility all on the men).And then I got to this comment...a nugget of gold in the compost heap: When I entered high school, it was the first year when girls were allowed to wear pants.' Since then, of course, clothing standards have dropped to the point where girls are wearing next to nothing on top of low-cut, tight jeans, or short-shorts. In high school, I would have screamed my head off that it was unfair to tell us what to wear.' Now that we've had 30 years of half-dressed high fashion, and I've become older and wiser, I understand why modesty makes sense.' Our schools, especially here in California, are a complete disaster.' There are many reasons for it, but requiring that girls dress modestly and that boys dress respectfully is a good start.' Considering that hormones are bubbling like volcanoes, particularly in teenage boys, simple steps like this would make a difference.' I remember the days when people dressed up nicely just to go to the movies!' I'm not advocating this, but I would even be for school kids wearing uniforms.' It puts them in a different frame of mind.' Trying to get kids to sit still, pay attention and get an education is not only difficult, but as we see from our dismal failure in the last 20 to 30 years, is imperative for the future of this country.' Looking back, it does amaze me how much my opinion has changed.' It is said that the devil is in the details, and I must concur.' The small things that I thought didn't matter at all turn out to be very important, not only in and of themselves, but they are the blocks on which other decisions/behavior are built.' It's really hard to see this when you're 15 or even 25, but as have accumulated experience in life, it has become very clear. More >>

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Tags: Family/Relationships - ChildrenParentingSexStay-at-Home MomStay-At-Home-Moms
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