Confessions of A WAHM of Teens By Patricia Chadwick www.parentsandteens.com patti@parentsandteens.com Women work at home for different reasons. Some choose to workat home because of the flexibility it gives them. Some choose to work at home because they want to be their own boss. And some, feeling God's call to raise their families, choose to work at home because a job outside the home takes them away from this awesome responsibility. Those in this last category often call themselves WAHMs. Since I've been a stay-at-home mom, I've always had lots of jobs to help pay for the "extras" in our family. Nothing was ever really long term, just some freelance work here and there, usually where the kids could help me out. My children were always the priority. God did not call me to be the breadwinner of our family, but the heart of it. As my kids continued to grow and become more independent, however, I found that I had more free time to pursue a career of sorts. I didn't want to work outside the home, because I am a firm believer that God's call on a mother's life does not end when the kids reach Middle School. It is essential that a mom be available for her kids - even, no ESPECIALLY, when they are teens. So I found my niche and started working toward establishing myself in the field of writing, working from the computer in my parlor. But I found that while I pursue this new career, I need to be careful that I don't neglect my primary job - being a wife and mother. Many days I have found myself at the computer until late at night while my husband and kids were off taking care of themselves. It really was an easy trap to fall into. I no longer had a toddler to pull at my pant leg or try to climb up into my lap while I was working. And they were really good about it, so it was easy to go back to the computer after supper and work into the night. One day I realized that this was becoming a habit and they were living there lives around me, not with me. Many times we forget that our teenagers need us to be available for them. Our being constantly busy sends a message to our them that other things are more important to us than they are. If we are too absorbed in our work, even while we are home, we will miss valuable opportunities for communication. Children need their mom no matter what the age. Even if they seem all grown up on the outside, they still need their parents to show an interest in and be a part of their lives. God still give us this precious opportunity to mold and shape their lives. If you are like me, a stay-at-home mom who has taken on a new career as a work-at-home mom, let's not forget our true vision for being a WAHM - putting our families first. Patricia Chadwick is a freelance writer and member of Mommy Works At Home, which offers moms the opportunity to earn a good income with a minimal investment. To find out more about how you can actually make money from home and have access to a great WAHM library visit: www.parentsandteens.com/mwah.html . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Driving Me Crazy! By Patricia Chadwick www.parentsandteens.com One of the biggest milestones in a teenager's life is becoming old enough to obtain his/her driving license. I live in New York State and here 16 is the magic number. I can remember myself, just on the edge of that enchanted birthday, awaiting the day with bated breath. As soon as the day dawned, I crammed for my written test and at 8:00 am sharp, I was down at the DMV taking the test to obtain my learner's permit. And woe to the teen whose birthday happened to be on the weekend during that 16th year! They'd have to wait until the following Monday to take their written test to obtain their learner's permit! Did you ever notice how history has a way of repeating itself? Now, 20 years later, my oldest has his learner's permit and my daughter, who is fifteen and counting, is chomping at the bit for her 16th birthdayto roll around. Now, as my dear mother would say, it's payback time! I now know what they went through with a cocky teenager behind the wheel of the family car, learning how to drive! My first teaching experience with my son was a real trip. Not being a very "machine oriented" young man, it was interesting watching him acquaint himself with the driver's side of the car. His main concern was how to keep one arm out the window, be able to turn the car stereo to the correct station, and keep one hand on the wheel at all times! Needless to say, Junior wasn't happy when I insisted on closed windows, both hands on the wheel, and the radio OFF! But he got over it! Soon we were buzzing down the highway at a good clip of 20 miles an hour. It was a little harder than he imagined! One of our first trips was to his workplace where he very suavely went to the drive-through window and placed an order. The smile on his face as his co-workers "oohed ahhed" over him being behind the driver's wheel was worth my racing heart as he just missed crashing into the building as we rounded the corner to the pick-up window. Not being totally cold-hearted, I did let him keep the window down and play the radio until we were out of sight! Since my son began learning to drive, my daughter has been anticipating her own chance to get behind the wheel. Periodically she nags me to let her drive - without her learner's permit. Upon her request my hearty laugh can be heard echoing throughout the entire neighborhood. She is not amused. After I quit laughing, I try to assure her that soon it will be her turn. They grow up so fast, don't they? One day you are pushing them in a stroller and the next they are pushing you to let them drive your car! But it's all a part of life and rather than fight it, I've decided toaccept it. All I can do is teach them how to be responsible and handle their new-found freedoms and privileges with caution. Patti Chadwick is a SAHM of 3 wonderful teens. Visit her websites at: www.historyswomen.com and www.parentsandteens.com Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

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On Hand Presents Make Gift Giving Easy By Cheryl Gochnauer "Mommy, Billy's birthday party is tomorrow." Not quite ready for the wakeup call you received while tucking your child in tonight? Don't let "Surprise!" take all the fun out of your gift giving. Instead, pull together a stash of unisex presents and packaging so you'll never flip out at last-minute party announcements again. Party On. With 8 children ranging in age from 4 to 15, Kansas mom Elaine Munyan is a hearty advocate of pre-stocking. "If I run across a good deal, like specials on coloring books, paints, crayons, markers - anything like that - I buy a whole bunch," Munyan says. "That way, when a birthday creeps up unexpectedly, I can just take my child shopping in my closet." A suggested hoard for youngsters: beanbag dolls, books, travel-sized games, art supplies, yo-yos, zoo passes, sidewalk chalk and bubbles. When shopping at discount stores, keep your eyes peeled for clearance signs. I found a cart at Wal-Mart that had Winnie the Pooh journal/stationery sets, normally $7.95, slashed to $1.00 each. I bought eight presents for the price of one, and now I'm set for girls' birthday parties through the end of the year. Grown-Up Gifts. It's nice to have presents for adults on hand, too, especially during the holidays, when seldom-seen friends can drop in unexpectedly. Consider stashing some movie passes, gift certificates, or flavored coffees and teas. Teens appreciate candles, salsas, and calligraphy pens. All of these are relatively small items that can be stored easily. I recently spotted dessert bread mixes (cranberry, pecan, banana, carrot, etc.) on sale for $1.50 each. I'd been saving my bread mix coupons for several months, anticipating such a sale. The grocery store doubled my coupons, slashing my cost to 50-60 cents a box. I bought 16 mixes, a total investment of about $9.00. Throughout the Christmas season, I'll bring fresh bread (wrapped in colorful cellophane with a bow) whenever I'm asked to provide treats. The loaves make great gifts for teachers and neighbors, too. Eye of The Beholder. Traditional giftwrap and bows work fine, but why not mix packaging up a bit? "We're doing a lot of mesh bags," says Ken Hamilton, owner of Bugs Ear Gifts in Liberty, Missouri. "People pick out what they want, put it in a bag, and we tie it off with a bow." The empty colorful mesh bags are reusable, made from recycled products, and sell for under a dollar. Scrunch a bunch in your closet to fill when that unexpected invitation comes your way. Here's a tip for fun kids' or baby shower presents. Take plastic sand buckets, decorate them with paint pens and stickers, then fill with small gifts. Store already assembled buckets on a top shelf for easy grab-and-go. In a pinch, a paper sack can be transformed into a personalized gift bag using paint pens, stickers and crayons. Colored newspaper comics still make nifty wrapping paper, too. Instead of spending time browsing greeting card racks, keep a stack of unlined colored index cards and a set of pinking shears handy. Cut an index card into a fanciful shape, write a personal heartfelt sentiment, then use ribbon to attach it to a gift. It's Outta Here. If you exchange gifts with out-of-town friends and family, don't forget to set aside the necessary shipping materials. Keep a couple of padded envelopes on hand, along with brown wrapping paper and sturdy packing tape. Stockpile small gifts and packaging for unexpected surprises, and you'll put a wrap on unplanned shopping frenzies. www.SheLovesGod.Com is holding their second annual Virtual Women's Conference this week, and Cheryl is leading the "Becoming a Stay-at-Home Mom" teleclass on Thursday, October 18. For more details on how to sign up for this almost-free event (long distance phone charges may apply), visit www.shelovesgod.com/classes/ . Copyright 2001 Homebodies.Org, LLC. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

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Moments for Mom by Elisabeth K. Corcoran My precious Sara. A girly girl through and through. Last year she went through a bit of a phase of wearing a leotard (fully loaded with tutu and crown and scepter, I might add) around the house just for kicks. Like, every day, basically. I thought it was cute, until I tried to take her out in public and she refused to put on anything else. Well, now, her preference is a dress. Every day. Even if we#146;re just hanging out at home. So in my attempt to appease my daughter#146;s boycott on pants, I have done my best to stock up on all kinds of dresses. Ones she can just kick around in at home, some for school, and some for church. Now, I also stumbled upon about 3 really wonderful dresses that I am saving for the holidays #150; these beauties will be perfect for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year#146;s and all the festivities in between. Here#146;s the thing. A ways back, when tackling the clothing switch project (removing all summer clothes from her closet and replacing them with fall winter), I filled her closet with all of her new dresses#133;including those sparkly, furry, dressy dresses set apart just for the holidays. Well, you can just imagine her first glimpse into that closet #150; it was like a brand new wardrobe. So many choices (so many decisions!) #150; she now had a reason to change her outfit two and three and four times a day! (Oy vay!) But with as much flair as any human can muster, with that same human nature always looking for something they can#146;t have #150; she asked to wear, each day, her Christmas dresses. And each day, for about three weeks, I told her the same thing, "No, honey #150; we#146;re saving those for special occasions." And each day she#146;d pitch a mini fit and we#146;d have it out.Until one day this week. She was deciding what to wear and proclaimed to me, pointing to those exceptional dresses, "But not these, right, Mommy? These are for special times, right?" And before I could say yes, she went on to say, in more wisdom than I usually have, "Mommy, can you just put them away then? I don#146;t even want to see them anymore."The temptation was too much for my precious little girl#146;s heart to bear. She so much wanted to look her most beautiful, but her Mommy knew that if she wore them now, they wouldn#146;t be as special later. And she just couldn#146;t stand being told no anymore. So she asked to have them removed from her life until they could actually be choices in the running again. Wow #150; how I wish I had the wisdom to take a look around my life and see what catches my eye that maybe shouldn#146;t. What person or thing or idea that steals a bit of my heart each day that I know I can#146;t and shouldn#146;t be even mulling over #150; and then taking matters into my own hands and removing the enticement from my life. Maybe I#146;ll just have to do that. Because my God, who occasionally says no to me, knows what He#146;s talking about too. But how much easier on my heart to not even have something in front of me that makes me drift in the first place. More >>

"BEST BARGAINS#148; By Cheryl Gochnauer Where are the caravans of mothers roaming yard to yard, greeting fellow shoppers they'd already seen at three other sales today? My third grader needs a nice winter coat. Groaning, I remember the pristine parka I passed up this summer. Its $8 price tag seemed ridiculously high when the thermometer was spiking at 95. Now I realize I will probably pay many times that amount to keep her warm this winter. I spot an arrow up ahead. Encouraged, I signal and turn the indicated direction. Three more pointers wind me through a subdivision, then disappear. Stranded, I drive up and down several streets, hoping to pick up the scent. Nothing. Looks like I blinked and missed my last chance this season to cut costs by sifting through my neighbors' stuff. The good-buy waterholes have dried up. I've got the Garage Sale Blues. Chiding myself for being such a miser, I head for the local discount store. Their prices really are quite reasonable, although it's hard to beat four shirts for a dollar. I remember spring, its warm breezes ushering in another era of raised doors and card tables on the driveway. Balloons, streamers and posters promised the "lowest prices, best deals." Sometimes, the bold boasts were genuine, and I splashed through piles of nearly new clothes that fit my children to a tee. We cheerfully haggled - I know it's a great deal at 50 cents, but will she take a quarter? Cast-offs became keepsakes. It's all just a memory now. Until the birds fly north, I'll have to console myself with Sunday fliers and holiday sales. Coupons in hand, I'll forge through clearance aisles. Occasionally, I may even pay - ouch - full price. Hold me back before I cross the line from conscientious shopper to penny-pinching cheapskate! I know I'm spoiled. Besides, although I missed the parka, I was smart enough to stock up on boots and sweaters last July. Like a chipmunk, I hoarded away clothes calculated to fit when my daughters hit those mid-winter growth spurts. We're pretty much prepared. Still, I'll miss digging for those elusive gems buried in all the junk. Until spring hatches another bargain-hunting season, I'll be singing the Garage Sale Blues. Comments? Write cheryl@homebodies.org or visit her website at www.homebodies.org. Copyright 2001 Homebodies.Org, LLC. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

Frighteningly Frugal Fun! By Tawra Kellam The average American family spends over $100 per year on Halloween goodies. As your kids drag you through aisles full of ghosts and goblins, the scariest thing about Halloween is threatening to leave bite marks in your pocketbook. No wonder so many moms flee screaming from the store... It can be much less expensive and a lot more fun to devise your own chilling creations. Here are a few tips that you can use to stave off the greenback gremlins and exercise your creative muscle. It won#146;t hurt a bit! These and other free frugal tips are available at www.notjustbeans.com Face Paint 1 tsp. corn starch frac12; tsp. water frac12; tsp. cold cream food coloring Mix all ingredients together in an old muffin pan and you are ready to paint. This amount makes one color. Fake Wound 1 Tbsp Vaseline tissue cocoa powder 2-3 drops red food coloring Place Vaseline in a bowl. Add food coloring. Blend with a toothpick. Stir in a pinch of cocoa to make a darker blood color. Separate tissue. Using 1 layer, tear a 2x3 inch piece and place at wound site. Cover with petroleum jelly and mold into the shape of a wound. The center should be lower than the sides. Fill the center with the red petroleum jelly mixture. Sprinkle center with some cocoa. Sprinkle a little around the edges of the wound to make darker. Fake Blood Mix 2/3 cup white corn syrup, 1 tsp. red food coloring, 2-3 drops blue food coloring to darken and 1 squirt dish soap (helps blood to run well). Abrasions -Dab brown, red and black eye shadow on area. Apply blood over area with cotton balls. Use comb to gently scratch area in one direction. Apply cocoa or dirt over wound with cotton balls. Black Eye -Apply red and blue eye shadow to depressions around eyes. Bruises-Rub red and blue shadow over bony area to simulate recent bruises. Blue and yellow eye shadow to create older bruises. Look Old - Cover face with baby powder. Draw dark lines on your skin for wrinkles. Smooth edges to blend. Cover again with baby powder. Add baby powder to your hair to create gray hair. Deviled Eyeballs-Make deviled eggs. Add a green olive with pimento in the center for an "eyeball". Radioactive Juice- Mix equal parts Mountain Dew and blue Kool-Aid Toxic Juice- Add some green food coloring to lemonade for a spooky color! Brains- Scramble eggs with some green, yellow and blue food coloring Bloody Eyeballs- Boil cherry tomatoes 30 seconds. Allow to cool; then peel skin. Goblin Hand- Freeze green Kool-Aid in a rubber or latex glove, float in punch. Use the tape from old cassettes or black yarn to make spider webs. Use cotton balls stretched out for small spider webs. Glass Jack-o-Lantern- Outline a pumpkin face on a spaghetti or pickle jar with black paint. The paint around the outside of it with orange paint. Place a candle inside for a jack-o-lantern. Halloween Guess It Game In this game, you challenge the participants to reach into mystery boxes filled with creepy things and try to guess what each item is. The person with the most correct answers wins the game. An example is if you want them to guess "grapes", you might try to confuse them by saying, "I think it#146;s eyeballs..." Cut a hole in the top of a shoe box or laundry box for each item to be used. Cover the box with black spray paint. Decorate each box with pumpkins or spiders for a more festive flavor. Place the following items inside, one per box. Be sure to place enough of each item so the guests can adequately "feel" the guts: Eyeballs - grapes or peeled cherry tomatoes Intestines- Cooked Spaghetti Skin- oil a piece of plastic bag Brains- scrambled eggs Hair- an old clown wig Bones- thoroughly washed chicken bones placed in some sand Vomit-chunky salsa Fingers-hot dogs cut into finger sized pieces Teeth- corn nuts, pine nuts or popcorn Have a Pumpkin Hunt Hide mini pumpkins like you would Easter Eggs. Let the kids find and decorate them. For small children use glue sticks with construction paper cut-outs for decorations. Edible Slime Pour lime gelatin into a glass bowl. After it is partially set, add gummy worms. Chill until lightly set. Then serve slopped all over the plate. Bloody Popcorn- Add red food color to melted butter and pour over popcorn. Freeze gummy worms in ice cubes and add them to drinks. Cut gummy worms in half if needed. Tawra Kellam is the author of the frugal cookbook Not Just Beans: 50 Years of Frugal Family Favorites. Not Just Beans is a frugal cookbook which has over 540 recipes and 400 tips. For more free tips and recipes visit our website at www.notjustbeans.com Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

Talking Politics with your Children By Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman www.personalpowerpress.com You are your child's first and most important teacher. You teach your children to walk, talk and ride a bike. You teach them about manners, respect, and the opposite sex. It is also your job to teach your children about the American way of life, our form of government, and the election process. It is not the high school's government teacher's job to teach your child about a participatory democracy. It is your job. It is not that teacher's responsibility to teach your child the value of dissent and the strength that comes from diversity and honest, but differing viewpoints. That is your responsibility. This year's Presidential election is a significant historical event. There is no better time than the present to include your entire family in the election process and learning about our government and how it works. Step up now and do your job. Teach your child valuable lessons in how and why you respect and love our democracy. Honor your role as your child's most important teacher by using the tips below to help you and your children be a part of history together. Share all sides of the political discussion. Don't just share your opinion. If you are a Republican, Democrat, or other, your job is not to convince your child that your thinking is correct. It is to get them to do their own thinking. Read to them from the newspaper, magazines and promotional material. Yes, you can share your views, but encourage your children to ask questions and come to their own conclusions. Talk about our country's political process and its significance. Talk about the democratic process and relate it to how you run your family. Show them the connections. Teach them what women and blacks had to endure to finally gain equal voting rights. Explain how some of us resisted those efforts and others worked to make it happen. Explain how not everyone agrees in our country, but that is one of our strengths. Watch the Presidential Debates together. Make this a happening. Treat it as something special. Announce it head of time. Then count it down, "Only two more days until the next debate." Show them through your actions that this is more important than Dancing with the Stars, Desperate Housewives, and The Simpson reruns. Take your children with you when you vote. Show them the voting process and explain what you are doing each step along the way. Take them into the voting booth with you and let them watch you mark your ballet. You get to do this. Seriously, take them in the both with you. Follow the election results together. Discuss the outcome with your children the next day if their bedtime dictates missing the most important information. Since the final results will come well after they are fast asleep, discuss the results at breakfast the next morning. Remind your children that some people will be particularly happy this day since the person they voted for got elected. Others, will be disappointed because their favorite candidate did not get elected. Discuss how mature people handle these kinds of situations and that in the democratic process it is important to support the final decision so we can work together as one country. Just like a family, our government works best when everyone gets involved and participates. Just like a family, our government works best when the leader accepts his or her responsibilities and leads to the best of their ability. It is time now for you to demonstrate to your children that you participate fully in our governmental process and in the education of your family. It is time for you to model for your children an effective leader who moves confidently into his responsibilities and teaches his family about the value of a participatory democracy. Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman are the authors of Teaching the Attraction Principle to Children: Practical Strategies for Parents and Teachers to Help Children Manifest a Better World . They are two of the world's foremost authorities on raising responsible, caring, confident children. They publish a free monthly e-zine for parents. To sign up for it or obtain more information about how they can help you or your group meet your parenting needs, visit their website today: www.personalpowerpress.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Are We Really Depriving Our Kids? By Jill Cooper One of the main questions I get asked about frugal living is "won#146;t I be depriving my children if I live the frugal life?" Maybe I can answer that question with a question.How am I depriving my children by having them drink water for every meal instead of juice and soda? Isn#146;t one thing doctors are always complaining about is we don#146;t drink enough water? Cutting out just one glass of soda per person per day for a family of four would save $547.50 a year and make them healthier. How am I depriving my children by having them eat an apple or homemade granola bar for a snack instead of a bag of chips? Obesity is a major problem among children in the United States. If you cut out just one bag of chips a week you would save $104.00 a year and make them healthier.How am I depriving my children by having them walk to school or to a friend#146;s house instead of my always driving them there? Lack of exercise is a big problem. You would save time and wear and tear on your car by having them walk and make them healthier at the same time. How am I depriving my children when I don#146;t buy them every toy they see and want? We wouldn#146;t dream of giving a baby on baby food all the chocolate that he wants because we know it would make him sick. His body can not tolerate that much chocolate even if he desires it. In the same way, an older child can#146;t emotionally deal with the overload of toys. I as an adult become stressed just from trying to buy a bottle of shampoo. Have you ever noticed how many options you have? Trying to make a decision can be overwhelming. Do I get it for thin, fine, dry and damaged or colored and permed hair? The list goes on and on. In the same way when a young child looks at mounds of toys, he can become very stressed over choosing which one to play with. If you watch, you will notice that they tend to play with the same couple of toys over and over. If you didn#146;t give them all the toys they asked for and bought one less brand new toy at $10 a week, you would save $520.00 in one year and you would help relieve them of some stress. It is no wonder our children stay confused. We insist that they should eat healthy yet we take them out to eat 3-5 times a week at Mc Donald#146;s. We give them a bag of carrot sticks in their lunch because it#146;s healthy and then give them a bag of chips when they get home from school to get them off our backs. We want them to have strong character yet the moment they whine or cry for another toy or some candy at the store we give in out of guilt. We are afraid that if we don#146;t give them what they want, they won#146;t love us so to rid ourselves of uncomfortable feelings we say yes. How can we teach them to be strong in character when we are so weak? How could our society and way of thinking have gotten so mixed up that we think a child is deprived if a mom chooses to stay home and not go to work? We have come to believe that moms should work outside the home so that children can have the most expensive clothes, education or material things. (Note I didn#146;t say best but rather most expensive since the most expensive doesn#146;t mean the best.) If a mom goes to work so a child can have all those things it#146;s not considered depriving the child of anything but it#146;s mom. Which do you think does a child more harm- being deprived expensive things or it#146;s mom? For you stay at home moms: Before you become too puffed up with pride be aware that too many social, church and school activities can deprive your children of you just as much as working. Do all things in moderation. Jill Cooper is the inspiration behind her daughter Tawra#146;s frugal cookbook Not Just Beans: 50 Years of Frugal Family Favorites. Not Just Beans is a frugal cookbook which has over 540 recipes and 400 tips. For more tips and recipes visit our website at www.notjustbeans.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>