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Parenting

Email of the Day: How I Got My Son to Stop Lying

By Dr. Laura on February 4, 2022
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My son was about seven when he lied about something not that serious โ€“ brushing his teeth. We talked about the character of someone who tells the truth, how they can be depended on, how people trust them, and how other people perceive them. I punished him by taking away his โ€œtech toysโ€ โ€“ anything that was either plugged in or used batteries โ€“ and I thought that would be the end of it. My son would NEVER lie to me again. I was sure of that.

 

A month later, he tested me again. It wasnโ€™t a terrible lie, but it was the act of lying that hurt me the most. I did something I heard on your program. I decided not to mention that I knew he was lying. Instead, I turned the tables on him and showed him how it felt to be lied TO. For one entire day, I lied to him every chance I got. For example, when he asked โ€œwhatโ€™s for dinner?โ€ I said โ€œMcDonaldโ€™s.โ€ โ€œCan I play in the ball pit?โ€ was sweetly met with a โ€œSureโ€ from me. When I began cooking dinner, he asked why, since we had already planned a trip to McDonaldโ€™s. I said, โ€œSorry, I lied.โ€ When I didnโ€™t let him play in the ball pit, I said โ€œSorry โ€“ I lied about that too.โ€ Iโ€™m not used to lying, so it took a lot of planning and crafting on my part to pull this off for the entire day. By the end of the day, he was crying every time I even opened my mouth. He promised me to never lie again, as he didnโ€™t like how it felt to be lied to.

 

Even when he was a teenager, I could hear his adolescent mind clicking when he even thought about lying. The flip side of that, however, is now he is painfully honest, and there are some things a mother just doesnโ€™t WANT to know!

 

Kathie

How I Got My Son to Stop Lying

 

 


 




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