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Marriage

Email of the Day: I Thought I Knew What Was Best. I Was Wrong.

By Dr. Laura on October 19, 2020
I Thought I Knew What Was Best. I Was Wrong.

My wife and I have been married 25 years.  This was her second marriage, but my first, and she already had a child when we married.  I tried to do everything right, providing a good home for my stepdaughter.  I did my best to make her a priority.  We had three more children, all boys.  When my daughter turned 12, she decided she wanted to live with her dad.  We were devastated, but eventually, she did go to live with him.

 

After listening to you, I realize the mistakes we made.  Your comment to a recent caller about their child wanting a home and not wanting to be a visitor in two homes hit me like a ton of bricks, and that’s when it all became clear to me.  You spend a lot of time on your program fighting for these kids and I finally get it.  I thought I knew what was best and that my stepdaughter would be okay with her mom and her new stepfather having a family together.  I was wrong.

We don’t have much of a relationship with her now, but we’re still very proud of her.  She’s happily married with a child.  The hard part is that she’s always β€œbusy” when we attempt to see her, and I understand where she’s coming from.  As adults, we need to stop being so selfish and worried about our own lives when we have little ones involved.  I regret that I was too immature or stupid – or both – to see that then.  Don’t ever stop advocating for the children, because you are 100 percent dead on.

 

Larry

I Thought I Knew What Was Best.  I Was Wrong.


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