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Email of the Day
Learning Lessons
Learning Lessons
09/11/2018

When my children were participating in sports, even though they usually loved the activity, there were times when they'd ask to quit.  Usually, that happened when they had to learn a new skill, and they were having trouble mastering it.  So, my deal with them was "Learn the new skill first.  After you do that, if you still want to quit, you may do so."  I was okay if they wanted to quit because they had genuinely lost interest, but not if it was because they didn't want to put in the effort.  I knew if they put in the work, it was likely they'd have a renewed sense of pride and love for their activity, which is what always happened.  

When my third child learned to play chess and showed a real interest, he joined a chess club.  However, he got discouraged when he kept losing games and wondered if he should give up.  I pointed out that the other kids had been playing a lot longer than he had, and if he kept practicing he would start winning more.  It took a while, but he did improve, and eventually, he became one of the better players at the club.  Then I saw how the "don't quit just because something's hard" mindset became part of them as they grew to young adulthood, and when they were faced with school or work difficulties, they remembered how they overcame them in the past and ended up tackling their new challenges with perseverance and confidence.  There were no snowflakes in our house!
Penelope



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Tags: Attitude, Behavior, Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Values
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