I'm asked a lot, “You're there to help everybody with their problems, but do you ever have problems?”
“Do you ever get upset?”
“Do you ever get in a mood?”
“Who do you go to?”
I'm fortunate to be accepted by a number of wonderful people who have great insight, wisdom, and compassion. We talk to each other about whatever we're having a hard time dealing with.
I called my friend on Sunday and said to her, “I am just completely overwhelmed. I feel like the second I try to do something, I remember I have to take care of something else. And then the second I try to take care of that, I remember I have to deal with another thing. And the second I started dealing with that and--”
She giggled and said, “Okay I'm going to hold a mirror up to you. What should you be saying to yourself, Dr. Laura?”
“Well, as of this last week, I'm not taking adequate control over five things that are bugging me,” I said.
"Say the five things,” she said, and I said them.
She then said wisely, “Well I guess... I surmise... I would offer.... My advice is... My idea is...”
She would change each one of them in some way.
Just like on this program, you often know exactly what to do and what's happening, but you can get overwhelmed. I felt like it all just dropped on my head at one time and that's it.
The first thing I did was take Lily for a walk and clear my head a little bit. Then, in one way or another, I took care of the five things.
These tasks didn't need to be dumped. They needed to be moved or altered in some way. All five things are going to happen, but I took the negative parts of them out.
It isn't necessarily that you have to dump things. Sometimes, you do. More often, you just have to alter it in some way; deal with a person and be clear about what do you want to have happen.
And that was my first thing. I made a phone call and I said, “Okay, this is what I am hoping won't happen and this is what I'm hoping will happen. I think everything will go better. Everybody will be happier.”
My call went well because there was no confrontation about it. There's no yelling, screaming, blaming. There's just communication. This will work for me. This won't work for me. This will make I think all of us happy. This won't. This is what I'd like to happen.
People say to me all the time, you're going to write an autobiography? No! What for? I don't remember everything. Some people keep logs and diaries. I remember the year I was born. After that, it's all fog.
Those five things were wearing on me, but after talking with my friend and developing an action plan, I became a happy camper again. I realized I was too busy trying to take care of my problems and I wasn't taking care of myself in the context of them.
I rely on my friends. The ones who are warm, brilliant, savvy, cute, adorable and wise. They know me quite well. That's the sort of thing I can help you with because I'm feeling very light these days after I took care of business.
The Dr. Laura Call of the Day Podcast