The Importance of DHA During Pregnancy and Breastfeeding Beth Vincent, MHS When I was six months pregnant with my third child I noticed the letters #148;DHA#148; popping up on infant formula labels in the grocery stores. Then I noticed it on egg cartons and began to wonder, "What is DHA and why is it being added to these foods?" This is an important question to ask - and the answer is noteworthy, especially for pregnant women. DHA (short for docosahexaenoic acid, an omega-3 long chain polyunsaturated fatty acid) is found in every cell in our bodies. It is critical for brain, eye and central nervous system development and functioning. During pregnancy, developing babies rely on their mothers to get needed DHA. Since DHA is derived from the foods we eat, the content of DHA in a mother#146;s diet determines the amount of DHA passed on to her developing baby. Unfortunately, the majority of pregnant women in the U.S. fail to get the recommended amount of DHA in their diets and DHA is not found in most prenatal vitamins. The good news is leaders in maternal health are beginning to educate women about the importance of DHA and some food manufacturers are starting to come up with creative ways to help people - pregnant and non-pregnant #150; get the DHA they need. Current research suggests adequate levels of DHA may help increase a developing baby#146;s cognitive functioning, reduce the risk of pre-term labor and decrease the risk of postpartum depression. Consider the following: A 2003 study published in the journal Pediatrics showed children whose mothers took a DHA supplement during pregnancy scored higher on intelligence tests at four years of age than children of mothers not taking DHA supplements. A 2004 study published in Child Development found that babies whose mothers had high blood levels of DHA at delivery had advanced attention spans into their second year of life. During the first six months of life these infants were two months ahead of babies whose mothers had lower DHA levels. Other research studies suggest breastfed babies have IQs of six to 10 points higher than formula-fed babies. Medical and nutritional experts attribute this difference to the In a trial of women receiving DHA supplementation during the third trimester, the average length of gestation increased six days ( Obstetrics Gynecology, 2003 ). Research has found low levels of DHA in mother#146;s milk and in the red blood cells of women with postpartum depression. ( Journal of Affective Disorders , 2002). Some scientists believe increasing levels of maternal DHA may reduce the risk of postpartum depression. Renowned figures speak out about DHA Research findings such as these have led pregnancy and child health experts to spread the word about the importance of DHA during pregnancy. Dr. William Sears, one of the nation#146;s leading experts on child health and development and longtime advocate of DHA, states #147;DHA is the most important brain-building nutrient at all ages, especially during pregnancy and the pre-school years when the child#146;s brain is growing the fastest.#148; Dr. Sears hosts DHADOC.com, a web site providing information on the importance of DHA in infant and maternal nutrition. In light of research findings and what he calls #147;common sense,#148; Dr. Sears recommends on his web site that pregnant and lactating women supplement their normal diet with 200 milligrams of DHA a day. In what many consider the modern day pregnancy bible, What to Expect When You are Expecting , Heidi Murkoff, et.al. , devotes a section to the importance of adequate DHA in the pregnancy diet chapter of her book. She explains that DHA is important during pregnancy, #147;especially during the last three months, when your baby#146;s brain grows at a rapid pace and lactation (the DHA content of a baby#146;s brain triples during the first three months of life).#148; Another maternity expert, Rebecca Matthias, president of Mothers Work, Inc., the nation#146;s leading maternity retailer touts the benefits of DHA in her latest book, 51 Secrets of Motherhood . She celebrates DHA as #147;the new wonder supplement that actually increases your baby#146;s growth.#148; DHA is hard to get in your diet Why do pregnant and lactating women, who so critically need DHA, find it difficult to get the recommended amount of this crucial nutrient in their diets? There are two primary reasons. First, during pregnancy the daily requirements of DHA increase from 220 mg to somewhere between 300 and 1,000 mg (depending on which expert you consult). Second, DHA isn#146;t easy to get in your diet #150; especially when you are pregnant. Significant amounts of DHA are found in animal organ meats and fatty fish. Not the typical menu for most pregnant women! Liver does not hold mass appeal and we#146;re told to limit our intake of fish due to concerns over toxins. No wonder a recent study of 112 pregnant or lactating women found that fewer than 2 percent met the FDA#146;s current guidelines for adequate daily DHA consumption. So what should pregnant women do to safely increase the DHA in their diets? A friend of mine began grinding flax seed onto her cereal every morning. Unfortunately putting flax seed on your cereal is probably a waste of time. Despite popular belief DHA is not found in flax seed. Flax seed (and green leafy vegetables) are sources of alpha-linolenic acid which may convert to DHA, but the process is inefficient and according to some experts may not happen at all. Alternatively you might choose to eat some of the #147;safer#148; fish choices such as pollock, haddock and cod. But according to Dr. Barbara Levine, associate professor of nutrition in medicine at Weill Medical College of Cornell University, #147;the purest source of DHA is not the fish itself, but rather what fish consume: the ocean#146;s vegetarian plant algae. Taking DHA supplements produced from marine algae is therefore a safe way for pregnant women to boost their fatty acid stores,#148; Levine says. Martek Biosciences owns the technology that allows DHA to be manufactured from algae. DHA supplements made with Martek DHA are now available in health food and drug stores, as well as some maternity stores. If you don#146;t want to take yet another pill, look for other foods fortified with Martek DHA. As leaders in all areas of maternal and child health continue to speak out about the importance of DHA for pregnant women, we can expect to see more food manufacturers offering products fortified with DHA. It takes time, but the word gets out. As Dr. Levine states, #147;It took forever to get the message across about the importance of folic acid early in pregnancy, but now it is in our products and most women get what they need. Now we are trying to get the message out about DHA.#148; Thanks to perinatal health education efforts and thoughtful manufacturing today#146;s mothers-to-be and new moms can ensure their babies get the DHA they need to thrive. DHA is critical for developing babies during pregnancy and lactation #150; the benefits of this fatty acid last forever. About the author: Beth Vincent is CEO and co-founder of Vincent Foods LLC. Beth holds a Masters degree from Johns Hopkins School of Public Health in Health Policy and Management. She has extensive knowledge in public health and maternal and child health having worked as a health care consultant specializing in maternal and child health and as a birthing doula prior to starting her company. Beth is a mother of three and lives in Baltimore, Maryland. For more information about Beth#146;s company, Oh Mama!, visit www.ohmamabar.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

6 Tips for Asset Focused Parenting By Dawna Markova Author of The Smart Parenting Revolution #150; A Powerful New Approach to Unleashing Your Child's Potential As a nation, our attention on our children has shifted - from what might be natural assets to be developed in them, to what deficits need to be fixed. We are all wired differently. As such, an "asset-focused" parenting revolution is on the rise to help us remember to focus on what works. We can truly help our children succeed by going with the particular grain of their minds to help them to overcome challenges and foster their unique gifts. The message is that they don't have to master everything, but they can learn to trust in their own abilities. Here are just a few ways you can continue to help your children#146;s forward movement so that they can develop relationships of trust with their own minds: Instead of focusing on what goes wrong, begin to study and amplify what#146;s right about both you and your child. As you tuck your child into bed, ask for and share three things that went right during the day. With your child, begin a joint study of the causes of positive events. What about his studying for that math exam made it possible for him to get such a great score? What was it that made you feel so excited about what happened at work? What made it possible for your daughter to learn to play soccer so readily: was it watching someone else, or being told how to make a particular play before she had to do it? How did he and she resolve that fight instead of beating up on each other? Post #147;Strength#148; stickies on the refrigerator, a different color for each member of the family. A strength is anything a person does that gives them energy when they do it, and that they#146;ve always been able to do really well. Let each child design a play time for the rest of the family, based on his or her strengths. Jerome might have the whole family plan scenarios for the next vacation. Ana Li might interview each family member about the ways they are smart, and then make a big chart that anyone could add to. Dawna could tell stories at dinner on Tuesday nights about strengths she noticed each family member exemplifying during the week. Do a family boredom study: Have each family member study their own minds when they are #147;bored,#148; and report at dinner what they discovered about what boredom feels like in their body, how to turn boredom into daydreaming, what triggered their boredom, what happens when they use a strength in a task that has always bored them, etc. Have Family Focus meals: Each dinner can be a time when the entire family focuses attention on one person, asking questions about their latest hero or heroine, what activity has made them happiest that week, what three things went well, how they#146;ve used their strengths to face a challenge, etc. It is important to understand that recognizing assets is not the same as giving praise or compliments. To praise is to give generalized compliments about a child in order to make him or her feel good. #147;You#146;re so cute.#148; #147;What a handsome young man.#148; #147;Oh your picture is beautiful.#148; I think of praise like candy. It may taste good, but it doesn#146;t nourish. Consuming too much can spoil a child#146;s appetite. Recognizing assets, on the other hand, is noticing what specifically is true about a child#146;s abilities, what he or she has accomplished, learned and achieved, his or her patterns of success. Recognizing your child#146;s assets does not require that you become a different or better parent; merely that you shift what you are paying attention to. Rather than worrying that your child won#146;t measure up to other children, won#146;t get into a good college, won#146;t do well on the test, you can #147;worry well, #148; by thinking about what he or she does do well and wondering how to grow that. You and your child will be having conversations that will help you both investigate the pattern of what works and apply it to situations where something doesn#146;t work. Dawna Markova, Ph.D., Author of The Smart Parenting Revolution - A Powerful New Approach to Unleashing Your Child's Potential is internationally known for her groundbreaking research in the fields of learning and perception. She serves as the president of SmartWired, the CEO of Professional Thinking Partners, and a research member of the Society for Organizational Learning, founded by Peter Senge of the Sloan School at MIT. In the past forty years, Markova#146;s work has expanded into the boardrooms and corporate headquarters of companies in America, Europe, Asia, and Africa. She now reaches hundreds of thousands of people around the globe through seminars, keynote speeches, and her eight books, which have been translated into seven languages. Dr. Markova was recently honored with the Visions to Action Award, #147;for people who have made a profound contribution to the world.#148; She lives in Northern California. Visit Donna at www.smartwired.org . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

Healthier Halloween By Cheryl Tallman and Joan Ahlers Halloween is truly a kid#146;s holiday #150;- good friends, creative costumes, event-filled parties #150;- all with a cool spooky theme -- who could ask for more? Oh yes, one more thing, the treats #150;- lots of sugary candy treats! With all the fun of this holiday come a parent#146;s worst fears -#150; too many sugary treats in your kid's possession and the arguments that ensue over this treasured trove. If you don#146;t feel like to contributing to the neighborhood children#146;s tooth decay, consider giving treats that are healthier. Here are some suggestions: Cheese and cracker packages Naturally flavored and sweetened gun or sugar-free gum Small bags of pretzels Small packages of nuts or raisins Peanuts in the shell Fruit-Roll Ups Granola bars If you are not opposed to sugar, but would prefer your treats to be natural or vegan, we suggest you visit your local natural food store. There are many natural candy companies that offer a big variety of candies. The one drawback, expect to pay more for these items. Natural products come at a higher price tag. You could make a homemade treat. Unless you are in a neighborhood with close friends, we don#146;t suggest this approach. Most parents are trained to go through the Halloween candy and throw out unopened, unwrapped or homemade treats. If you decide to make your treats, wrap your homemade item up well, and add your name and phone number to the bag with the treat. If the parent recognizes your name, it will make them feel the treat is safe. Halloween treats do not have to be edible An alternative to avoiding the junk food challenges is to hand out a non-food treat. Today, many families are opting for this choice. With a little bit of thought and some clever shopping, you can find some really nice items for a few cents per item. Here are few ideas: Cool stickers or temporary tattoos Halloween balloons, you can even rent a helium tanks and fill them on the spot Crayons, pencils, colored chalk or fun-shaped erasers Whistles or noise makers Rubber spiders, worms, or other equally creepy figure Spider, skull, or pumpkin plastic rings Check your local dollar store for fun items. There is also plenty of time to shop online, and have items shipped to you. DollarDays.com and OrientalTradingCompany.com are just two sites that offer a good selection. A quick search on Google will give you plenty more online sopping choices. Halloween Day: Star the day off right, with a festive breakfast of bagels, pumpkin cream cheese (recipe follows) and fresh apples. This meal also works as a great treat for a morning Halloween party at your child#146;s school. Pumpkin cream cheese Beat in a bowl: 8 ounces softened cream cheese 2 tablespoons brown sugar 1/2 cup of canned pumpkin 1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice Serve with toasted bagels and fresh apple slices. Before your children venture out in their costumes, make sure they eat a meal before going trick-or-treating. Try the Incredible White Bean Pizza recipe below. It is fast and simple. With full tummies, they won't be so tempted to dig into their bag of goodies before they get back home. Ask your kids not to eat candy while they are out. Incredible Bean Pizza 1 can white beans, drained and rinsed 1 clove garlic 2 tablespoons water frac12; teaspoon oregano 1 pizza crust (like Boboli) Shredded Mozzarella cheese Fresh diced tomatoes Chopped basil Directions: Puree first five ingredients in a blender and spread mixture over the pizza crust. Sprinkle with shredded mozzarella cheese, fresh, diced tomatoes and chopped basil. Bake in a 425 degree F oven until cheese is bubbly, about 10-12 minutes. When your children arrive back at home, don#146;t let them take control over their bag or bucket of candy. Working with them, check the treats and keep only treats which are unopened. Be sure to inspect fruits and homemade goods for anything suspicious. While you are going through their candy, let them pick two or three treats that they can eat on this special night. Store the rest of the candy out of reach and out of sight. Over the next few days or weeks, rationing the treats is the best approach. Allow your children to make their own selections, but tell them they can pick one large piece or two small pieces. If your children have trouble with this, do it for them (in advance). Just place small amounts of candy in bags, and let them select one of the bags. If there is just too much candy, consider donating some of it to a shelter. It will bring smiles to others. About the authors: Cheryl Tallman and Joan Ahlers are sisters, the mothers of five children, and founders of Fresh Baby ( www.FreshBaby.com ). Raised by parents who love fresh foods and entertaining, their mom, a gourmet cook, ensured that they were well-equipped with extraordinary skills in the kitchen. Both with long track records of business success, they decided to combine their skills in the kitchen with their knowledge of healthy foods and children to create Fresh Baby. Cheryl and Joan put a modern twist on the conventional wisdom that when you make it yourself, you know it#146;s better. Their goal at Fresh Baby is to make the task of raising a healthy eater a little bit easier for all parents. Fresh Baby#146;s breastfeeding accessories and baby food making supplies provide parents with practical knowledge and innovative tools to support them in introducing their children to great tasting, all-natural foods #150; easily and conveniently. Visit them online at www.FreshBaby.com and subscribe to their Fresh Ideas newsletter to get monthly ideas, tips and activities for developing your family's healthy eating habits! Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

To Stress or Not to Stress? by Lesley Spencer, M.Sc. Founder President of HomeBasedWorkingMoms.com Today it seems that no matter who we are or what we do, we have more stress in our lives than our parents or grandparents did. There are many factors and demands that cause stress in our lives: things such as demanding careers, relationship conflicts, financial worries, health concerns, parenting challenges, legal issues, fear of the unknown and so many others. If that were not enough, the stress and worries these situations cause further diminish our ability to function well and to be healthy. In fact, stress can cause depression, fatigue, irritability, withdrawal, insomnia, appetite changes, head aches, lower sex drive and many other ailments and diseases. Some studies suggest that as much as 80% of all major illnesses are attributed to stress. Take note of that again -- as much as 80% of all major illnesses are attributed to stress! It is quite obvious -- stress is NOT good for us, and we are wise to get rid of as much of it as possible. So how do you do that? First, do you know what things in your life are causing you stress? Think about it and write down those things. Next, go through your list and write possible solutions and ways to ease stress for each of those stress causers. Then, make a plan to do those things. That plan may look like a daily reminder that you read, post-it notes on your computer or a daily quiet time of prayer. For those stress items that we cannot remove from our lives and for the unexpected stress that creeps into our lives, try these tips: When you feel tense or stress, stop what you are doing, close your eyes and take several deep breaths. Inhale slowly counting to 10 and exhale slowly counting to 10. Try to do this at least three times. You may need to do this several times a day. Start an exercise program. You may be amazed how much stress is relieved when you exercise. The endorphins that are released can reduce your stress, improve your mood and give you an energy boost. Play relaxing music or soothing sounds that calm and relax you. Plan a day off or at least plan some time just for yourself and do whatever is relaxing to you: sleep in, lay in a hammock, have coffee with a friend, take a bubble bath, have a glass of champagne, go for a hike, get a manicure or read a book. Count your blessings. Record things you are happy and thankful about. Read them daily and add to your list as you recognize new blessings and things to be thankful for. The goal is to have a longer #147;thankful#148; list than #147;stress#148; list. Focus on the positive and remind yourself of the positive things in your life often. Simplify your life. Are there unnecessary things in your life that you could remove? Are you over-extended or over-committed? Are their things in your life that you can outsource to simplify your life? Are your children in more than one extra-curricular activity? Is that adding more stress than is worth it? Find more joy. Are their things that can truly add joy to your life? What are they? Are you focusing too much on work or negative things in your life? Are you taking time to stop and enjoy your life, your family, and your children? Make today the day for new beginnings and for removing as much stress from your life as possible. Find joy. Make joy. Lesley Spencer is founder and president of the HBWM.com, Inc. Network which includes: http://www.HomeBasedWorkingMoms.com , http://www.WorkAtHomeKit.com , http://www.edirectoryofhomebasedcareers.com , http://www.momsworkathomesite.com , http://www.HBWMconferences.com , http://www.HBWMcanada.com and http://www.HireMyMom.com (coming soon!). She has a Master's Degree in Public Relations and has been featured in numerous media outlets including CBS News, Forbes, Business Week, Parents, Wall Street Journal and USA Today. She has been working from home for over 10 years and has two children whom she absolutely adores! Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Teaching Tips on Reading Skills for Kids By Jodie Lynn www.ParentToParent.com Getting kids to learn how to enjoy reading, can be quite stressful and frustrating for a parent. Here are some tips to utilize that seem to work well for those reluctant readers. Get your child a library card. As soon as he is old enough, let him get his own card. It is very exciting for kids to have their own card and make their own choices in reading material. Don't frown on his choice of books or reading material. Let your child make the choice on what to read. It might not be the book you would have picked out. In fact, it might even be a comic book, the back of a cereal box or a bubble gum wrapper. As long as your child picks up something and begins to read, it doesn't really matter. Let your kids see you reading. Laugh aloud and show them what it is that you are laughing about. Open the book to that specific page or picture and point to the words and read them to your child. Say, "Books can really be funny!" Set aside time for reading together. In the beginning, it might only be three times a week, then every other day and eventually move forward to each day. It almost always works best if you will take turns reading. Ask questions about what he just read. Don't do this with every page. Children know exactly what you are trying to do. Indeed, it works much better if you make a statement like, "Wait -- I don't understand why Jordan did not like the large red truck -- do you?" Encourage reading material on things he likes best. If your child loves Fairy Tales, shoot for that topic to begin. Alternatively, let them choose a wide variety of mixed topics, some of which you might was to roll your eyes -- but just stay calm and smile. Be Flexible: If you have a reading time scheduled and he just does not want to do it, go with the flow. It's important to show your child that reading is fun and is not a chore, test or quiz. You can always catch up later. Tape the session. Nothing is funnier as taping a reading session. Parents can get much farther with kids if they will let down their guard every once in a while and act silly. Play back the tape and your child will hear themselves reading and then hear your part where you acted silly. Maybe by changing your voice. Share personal stories. When reading with your child, point out a similar instance in real life. For example, if a character in the book falls down and drops a glass of milk, you could say, "That happened to me when I was seven." Or, "That's just like the time when you fell down after tripping over the dog...remember." Read everything aloud. If you will read signs, instructions, even the weather forecast off the TV and etc., aloud, your child will hear words and make a connection. He will see and hear how words are powerful, fun and descriptive while building his vocabulary and enjoyment for reading. Remember, don#146;t punish your child if they are not catching on to the joy of reading as quickly as you would like for them to -- it#146;ll all work out as long as you stay calm. copy; 2005 Jodie Lynn Jodie Lynn is an award-winning internationally syndicated family/health columnist and radio personality. Parent to Parent (http://www.ParentToParent.com) is now going into its tenth year and appears in newspapers, magazines, newsletters and throughout the Internet. Lynn has a regular family segment on radio programs. She has written two books and contributed to two others, one of which was on Oprah and has appeared on NBC in a three month parenting segment. Her latest best-selling parenting/family book is Mommy CEO, revised edition . Preorder Lynn's new book, "Mom CEO: Avoiding the Distressed Housewife Syndrome and Winning at Motherhood," online or from any bookstore in early 2006. See www.ParentToParent.com for more details. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

School Has Started, Yeah!!! Help with those hundreds of lunches ahead! Jill Cooper www.LivingOnADime.com It#146;s that wonderful time of year that lightens your heart and fills your soul with peace tranquility. No, I#146;m not talking about Christmas! I#146;m talking about school starting!! Yes! Yes! Yes! It#146;s a bitter sweet time for most moms. Bitter because you#146;re back to hectic mornings, finding everyone#146;s books and papers and trying to get them out of the door on time... because you now have 180 lunches to make over the next 9 months if you have 1 child and 720 if you have 4 -- But hey, who#146;s counting? It is sweet because the peaceful quietness that penetrates the house is like gentle music to your ears and you can take a lovely relaxing bubble bath without what sounds like the whole US army trying to break down the bathroom door. Well, now that I think about it, I#146;ve not known many moms that had the luxury of a bubble bath in the middle of the day but I can dream can#146;t I? I can#146;t help you find time for that bubble bath but maybe I can help you with those 720 lunches. Here are a few lunch and snack ideas from Dining On A Dime Cookbook: Eat Better Spend Less that will satisfy even the pickiest of eaters. To keep drinks cold in lunch boxes, pour a small amount in the bottom of the container (not glass) and then set the cap loosely on top. Put it in the freezer overnight. The next day fill with the rest of the drink. The ice should slowly melt all day long, keeping the beverage cool. Have the kids pre-package chips and cookies in bags on the weekends. Store in a basket. Grab one out as needed for lunches. Make a large batch of puddings and gelatins on the weekends. Pour into individual containers and refrigerate. Save the catsup and mustard packets and napkins you don#146;t use from the fast food restaurants. Use them in lunch boxes. Puddings - sprinkle with marshmallows, coconut, nuts, chocolate chips, butterscotch chips or peanut butter chips (for chocolate pudding) or berries (in vanilla pudding) Banana, pumpkin or zucchini bread Tuna, egg or chicken salad sandwich Tuna salad and crackers Sandwiches made from last night#146;s dinner meat (ie. roast beef, chicken ,turkey) Pickles Ants on a log-celery with peanut butter inside and raisins on the peanut butter Hot dogs Canned fruit Carrot sticks, celery sticks or radishes with Ranch dressing Homemade granola bars or cookies. Granola Bars 1 cup brown sugar frac14; cup sugar frac12; cup butter or margarine, softened 2 Tbsp. honey frac12; tsp. vanilla 1 egg 1 cup flour 1 tsp. cinnamon frac12; tsp. baking soda frac14; tsp. salt 1 frac12; cups rolled oats 1 frac14; cups crispy rice cereal frac12; cup wheat germ (optional) 1 cup chocolate chips* In a large bowl, cream sugars and butter until fluffy. Add honey, vanilla and egg. Mix well. Blend in flour, cinnamon, baking soda and salt. Stir in remaining ingredients. Press firmly into the bottom of a greased 9x13 pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 20-25 minutes. To microwave: Press ingredients into a microwave safe dish. Microwave on medium power for 7-9 minutes. Rotate dish every three minutes. Bars will firm as they stand. Cool and cut into bars. Save the crumbs for yogurt or ice cream topping. Makes 24 bars *The following may be used in addition to or to replace chocolate chips 1 cup coconut frac12; cup creamy or chunky peanut butter frac12; cup nuts frac12;-1 cup raisins, dried apples, apricots frac12; cup fruit preserves Apple Oatmeal Bars 1 cup oatmeal frac12; tsp. salt frac12; cup butter 1 cup flour frac12; tsp. cinnamon 2 frac12; cups apples, chopped or frac34; cup apple butter (omit cinnamon) frac12; cup sugar Combine the first five ingredients, and pat half into an 8x8 inch pan. Layer apples and sugar. Crumble remaining mixture on top. Bake 35 minutes at 350 degrees. Tawra Kellam is the author of Dining On A Dime Cookbook: Eat Better Spend Less (formerly Not Just Beans) with over 1200 recipes and tips. For more free tips and recipes visit her web site at www.LivingOnADime.com . In 5 years, Tawra and her husband paid off $20,000 personal debt on an average income of $22,000 per year. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Today#146;s Family Man #147;Night of the Shrinking Bed#148; By Gregory Keer On a cold night last year, my wife and I endured a fifth straight evening of multiple wake-ups from our newborn. After two feedings, three walks around the house, and four false-alarm cries, Wendy and I trembled with exhaustion. This was compounded by the stress of having just moved to a new home, my starting a teaching gig, and our older sons kicking off a new school year. Finally, sleep came and, when it did, I went down hard. That was until I felt a #147;presence#148; hovering over me. Dog-tired, I kept snoring. Then I heard a faint wheezing. The wheezing turned to heavy breathing, which got louder and louder. High-pitched moaning pierced my eardrums and my eyes snapped open. A dark shape stood next to me, holding what looked like an axe! I screamed. #147;Ahhhhhh!!!!.#148; My wife jumped up and shrieked, #147;Where#146;s the baby?#148; The figure screamed back. #147;Dadddeee!!!#148; Bolting upright, I recognized the shape as my son, Benjamin. The axe I imagined was his tattered blanket. My son burst into tears and fell across me in the aftermath of what had been a twisted recreation of the movie scene in which Drew Barrymore sees E.T. for the first time. In this case, I was Drew Barrymore. #147;What were you doing standing over me like that?#148; I said breathlessly. #147;I #150; just #150; wanted #150; to #150; cuddle,#148; Benjamin blurted between sobs. And there it was. The dramatic comeuppance for two parents who had long struggled with the issue of a family bed. Before my wife and I had children, we swore we'd never let our kids sleep with us. We judged others who let their kids in the bed, thinking that kind of arrangement could only create intimacy problems for the couple and therapy sessions for the children. Sometime later, we found ourselves changing our tune. It began when Benjamin, then almost three and new to a #147;big boy#148; bed without rails, started sneaking into our room in the middle of the night. Due to fatigue and the sheer joy of cuddling, we let him snuggle with us for a few hours each night. This went on for a couple of years until Jacob got old enough to leave the crib and want his own time in Mommy and Daddy#146;s bed. So we started a campaign to keep the kids on their own mattresses. We told them that they could crawl in with us in the morning, when it was light outside. Jacob, always a deeper sleeper, was easier to keep to the new rule. But we had to experiment with all kinds of tricks to keep Benjamin in his room. Over time, we tried clocks, a sleeping bag on our bedroom floor, extra stuffed animals, a special pillow, and just plain begging with intermittent success. Then, there was the previously mentioned night of all that wheezing and screaming. After we all calmed down, I escorted Benjamin to his bed, reminding him of the house rules. A little later, he returned. I got crankier and he went away wailing again. This back-and-forth occurred every 10 minutes, as he tried to gain our sympathy and we used every tactic from yelling to listing all the playdates he was going to lose. Then, my son Jacob joined the fray, shouting out like a lost child that his pull-up needed to be changed. Jacob fell back asleep but he was replaced by the dog that scratched at the door to go outside and the cat that upchucked a fur ball on the bed. All the while, my wife and I bickered about how to handle the whole mess. I pleaded with our first-born. I even cried when he cried, asking for mercy on his exhausted father who had to wake up to teach cranky high-school sophomores in the morning. Finally, with Benjamin as worn out as I was, I found clarity #150; kind of like a Bugs Bunny horror spoof in which the rabbit realizes the way to stop the monster is by complimenting him (#147;Gee, Doc, you got really big muscles.#148;) So, I appealed to Benjamin#146;s desire to feel like the big boy he was. "You graduated from kindergarten and now you're a first grader,#148; I explained. #147;It's time to graduate to sleeping the whole night on your own. You can do this." I then promised him a reward chart that would track how many nights he could stay in his bed. Things have been much better ever since. Benjamin still crawls into bed with us at 6am or so, but he's proud of himself. He#146;s graduated to sleeping on his own and we have our bed back. Now, if we could only get our baby to stop kicking his crib like a T-Rex three times a night, we could actually get some sleep. copy; 2005 Gregory Keer. All rights reserved. Gregory Keer is a syndicated columnist, educator, and on-air expert on fatherhood. His Family ManTM column appears in publications across the country, including L.A. Parent, Boston Parents' Paper, Metro Augusta Parent, and Sydney's Child in Australia. Keer's parenting advice is found at his online magazine, www.familymanonline.com , which is the #1 ranked site for fathers, according to Amazon#146;s Alexa ratings. In addition to writing for Parenting magazine and the Parents' Choice Foundation, Keer contributes to USA Today, Pregnancy magazine, DrLaura.com, ParentingBookmark.com, Pregnancy.org, and CanadianParents.com. Keer is also a featured guest expert on television and radio and advisor to the Cartoon Network. He and his wife are the proud parents of three sons. Keer can be reached at his Web site, www.familymanonline.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com More >>

Seven Ways to Protect Your Family from Internet Dangers By Steve Cross It#146;s the Wild West on the Internet, and as a parent you are responsible for keeping your kids safe #147;out there,#148; Even though #147;out there#148; may be two feet away from your kitchen while you are preparing dinner. Scammers, sexual predators, cyber bullies, and every type of hack are lurking on the Internet, in a very real and aggressive sense. If you are the parent of a girl, you probably think about what name she is using in chat rooms and for instant messaging (IM), and you are wise to be concerned. How can you protect your daughter if you are unaware what web sites she visits, what chat rooms, who she chats with, and the true identities of her online #147;friends?#148; If your teenager is a boy; what is he downloading? Are you going to be liable for illegal music downloads? Is he downloading porn, and the viruses that ride along? What sites does he visit, what does he look at there? It#146;s a parents right to know these things, and a parent#146;s responsibility if, heaven forbid, something goes terribly wrong. Boys are aggressive downloaders, according to studies and many of the most popular sites for illegal downloads of music and movies are infested with viruses, worms, and Trojan Horses (hacker software that sneaks in and lets the hackers use your machine later!). Many of these programs will seek out your personal data and then transmit it to the hackers. Whether it is just the theft of your credit card information or full fledged Identity Theft, you would be very wise to be alarmed by this possibility. Did you know that recent studies show that teenage girls spend even more time on the internet than boys? That#146;s interesting and alarming news, as teenage girls are more likely to be cyber bullied, or sexually harassed online than boys. Dr. Michele Borba, internationally renowned educational consultant and author of 20 books, wrote #147;There are some specific ways to protect kids from bullying both in cyberspace and on the playground. Parents today need a closer #147;electronic leash#148; on their kids and need to be more tuned into the cyberspace trend. This isn't about being controlling--this is good parenting.#148; To extend her point, the monitoring of your children#146;s activities on the internet is not about control, or infringing upon their privacy, it#146;s about protecting your children from very real threats. Some internet service providers (like AOL and MSN) have built in parental controls to #147;block out#148; certain types of web sites. However, none of these parental controls are foolproof, which means your kids are on the loose much of the time#151;and if you are a typical family, your kids probably know more about computers than you. You can#146;t look over their shoulder at all times, but you can do a number of very smart things. Here are seven ways to keep your kids safe when they use the Internet. Talk to them about the dangers of unrestricted use of the internet. Inform them about keeping passwords really secret, never sharing a credit card number with anyone, even their best friend. And please talk with them about cyber bullying, whether they are on the receiving end, or the giving end. If they are on the giving end of cyber bullying, you must take away their privileges immediately. You have liability here, both ethical and legal. If they are illegally downloading music and movies, make them stop. If the studios or record companies come after them, as their parent you have the legal responsibility of paying the fines. Talk to them about stalkers and predators on the internet that use false identities, and urge them to be careful in chat rooms. Use the parental controls that come with your internet service. Take the computer out of their rooms and place it in a common area in the house. Your kids are much less likely to do something inappropriate or dangerous if other people are around. Look into Internet Monitoring Software Steve Cross, author of the book "Changing Channels", is a former columnist for Newman Media, Channel Media, and the Gartner Group. Steve is a contributor to various jazz publications. Currently, Steve serves as the Steve is president of Guardian Software. http://www.guardiansoftware.com/monitor-pro.html Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

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Don#146;t Give Up -- Try Our Two Secrets to Success At Home Creativity Persistence By: Jill Hart Working from home can be a very rewarding decision. There are so many benefits including freedom to create your own schedule, choosing the type of business that you want to represent, and being able to raise your children yourself. However, running a business can also become a very stressful situation. It takes time to build a successful business and many entrepreneurs become discouraged if they don#146;t achieve immediate results. Often times they give up too soon and regret it later. This doesn#146;t have to happen to you. Let us share with you what we found to be two top secrets to help you achieve success at home. One important thing that many work-at-home moms do not recognize is that it can take six months to a year at minimum for your business to be successful financially. If you are aware of this going into the business and have planned accordingly, then you are already one step ahead of the game and won#146;t become unnecessarily discouraged. Also, be aware that the time frame it takes to start a business will vary depending on the type of business that you are starting. For example, for those that are starting in direct sales, you may be able to jump in, hold some home parties, and see an income right away. In this case, then you just need to focus on maintaining this income to keep it successful. However, if you are starting an Internet business selling your own products or services, it may take much longer to see the fruits of your labor. For some, it can take a year or even two to create a #147;presence#148; online and for people to recognize and seek out your products. You will find that the benefits are well worth the time and effort in the end, but it can be discouraging waiting to see a profit. So, how does a person make it in the work-at-home world? I think the two most important aspects of running your own business from home are creativity and persistence. Creativity#151;Be creative in how you market your products and/or services. Start by thinking of ways that you can reach customers that will make you stand out from others who offer similar types of products. Design contests, free offers and other types of marketing strategies that will bring customers to your website. Then, try to determine what your customers are looking for once they reach your website and offer the most popular products on your front page. Keep in mind that it#146;s important to keep your website fresh so consider changing the items or text on your website#146;s front page often. This will continue to pique the interest of your customers each time they visit and encourage them to come back. Persistence#151;This is key when you are running a business from home. Don#146;t start out strong marketing yourself in every way possible and then simply stop marketing because you haven#146;t seen many sales. Most profitable businesses must continually be marketing their services to keep it successful. Try to think of a successful business that does no advertising. Can they just sit back and let the sales roll in from their website? Not really. It just doesn#146;t work that way. EVERY business must continue to advertise in some way to stay successful. For example, we found at Christian Work At Home Moms ( CWHAM.com ) that those that achieve the most success are the consistent advertisers, the ones who advertise regularly and keep their businesses, banners, and other promotions in front of their potential clients. This does not mean that you must spend hundreds of dollars a month to advertise your home-based business. What it does mean is that you must be persistent in the advertising that you choose to do. Budget your advertising dollars in a way that you can do a small amount consistently. Get involved in groups online and ask advice from other successful moms. Whatever you do, don#146;t stop talking about your business! And most importantly, don#146;t give up. Success IS possible. Take the time to be creative in how you are marketing your business. Be persistent and don#146;t expect profits immediately. Set realistic goals for your business and be patient while your business grows into something you can be proud of. Soon you#146;ll be among the millions of work-at-home moms who are enjoying it all: Being home with the kids, financial freedom, and the pride of having their own home-based business. Jill Hart is the author of the e-book, 2 Weeks Devotional Journey for Christian Work at Home Moms , and the founder and editor of Christian Work at Home Moms CWHAM.com . This site is dedicated to providing work at home moms with opportunities to promote their businesses while at the same time providing them spiritual encouragement and articles. E-mail Jill at jill@cwahm.com for additional information or stop by her site at CWHAM.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. This article is free to reprint if the Author#146;s Bio remains in tact. For additional articles, please contact Jill Hart. More >>