I’m a 48-year-old widow. I lost my wonderful husband five years ago to brain cancer. He was always overly supportive of me and told everyone how much he loved me and was honored to be my husband. I know now how special he was.
For the last nine months, I’ve been dating a new man. He’s not emotional like my first husband, but his actions say a lot. He’s kind to me and treats me well. Recently, I was diagnosed with early-stage osteoarthritis, and the news really upset me. I cried when my doctor told me, because I’m a very active person and the news was hard to hear. It’s only going to get worse as I get older.
My boyfriend was very sweet to me when I told him, but I expected him to know that he needed to hold me and tell me he would still care for me and tell me “you’re beautiful, no matter what.” He didn’t. He didn’t say anything. He just kissed me like it was a normal day. That’s when I said “Honey, I’m taking this news very hard. I needed you to walk in, hold me and say it will be okay.” He looked at me, said “Okay babe, come here.” He just held me, and that’s all that I needed. He listened and all it took was for me to say it out loud. Rather than being mad or stressed out by his lack of response, I communicated what I needed. And it worked. Thank you for showing us how to communicate with the men in our lives. It’s made a big (and positive) difference.
Laurie
Sometimes All You Have to Do is Ask
