Fearless Living By Dr. Santi Meunier www.santimeunier.com Fearless Living is for people who want to live out their dreams, not their fears. All of us are here living at this moment in time for a reason. For some of us the purpose of our lives is apparent. We know who we are and what we want to do and we do it. The majority of us, however, feel lost to one degree or another. We look at those other people with envy and awe. How is it that they are so clear and focused? What can we do to find our way when the only path we see is riddled with fear and confusion? Before we can do anything to change our current state, we have to undo some common, self-defeating mental habits. Stop comparing your self to others. Our ego sets us up by doing this and it is a losing proposition. Judging our insides by someone else's outside appearances is like trying to determine what something tastes like by the way it looks. Sure that may work once in a while, but would anyone eat a coconut based on its "hairy" shell? Realize that no one gets a free ride in this life. We all have challenges and lessons to learn. If we are a good, diligent student we will gain not only knowledge, but self-esteem and happiness. Mind your own business. Many people are so busy focusing on what others "should" be doing that they ignore their own work. This is an avoidant pattern that has to stop. We can care about others, but let them do their own work. If we are overwhelmed by fear and self-judgment, recognize that those thoughts reinforce the very things we are trying to escape. Mental discipline is essential - one thought at a time. Stop operating on "should" and "have to". When life is full of "should" and "have to", our energy drains out of us. When fear has reached a point of immobilizing us we feel stuck and start to procrastinate, which over time creates a vicious cycle of self-sabotage. Stop blaming yourself. Anyone can become overwhelmed with fear. It is what happens next that separates the fearful from the fearless. Staying overwhelmed cannot be an option. We alone are responsible for our lives. Quick Tip: Ask to be a gentle observer. When you find yourself caught up in any of these thoughts - witness it and then release it. We can take back a thought at anytime. Don't just correct it, take it back. Example: "This job is killing me!" Realizing that is not what you want to create say, "I take that back. This job is difficult, show me how to better cope with what is put in front of me." Be still enough to receive any guidance that may come your way. We strengthen what we focus on. Focusing on our fears creates more fear. Because we are all in a constant state of creating, both consciously and unconsciously, it is very important to pay attention to what our mind is doing. Mental discipline begins when we realize when we are focusing on our fears. We can then, "move a muscle to change a thought". Do something! Take an action#133;to break the grip of the fear state. Positive self-talk is very important as well. Listen to what we say to ourselves. Is this thought helpful or not helpful; positive or negative? Breaking free from the grip of fear, and learning how to create what we want instead of what we fear is available to all of us. Make a decision. Is fear going to be in control of you, or are you going to be in control of your fear? Challenge the fear. Often we just let fear tells us what is true without ever questioning it. Start questioning the truth in what your fear is telling you. Do it anyway. Be afraid and do the right thing for yourself and your life. Then you will have less fear than before. The sure fire way to get more fear is to give into fear. It is like the Sesame Street cookie monster, It always want MORE! The key is to begin. No one else can fill your place in the great scheme of things. Remember, the world needs you to succeed and to bring to it your unique contribution. Author and speaker Dr. Santi Meunier is recognized for her unique style and her ground-breaking strategies for personal and professional growth. Her program, Practical Spirituality for Fearless Living has helped thousands to enrich their lives and realize their dreams. For more information visit www.santimeunier.com . Permission granted for use on drlaura.com. More >>

Tools for Getting Through to Your Preschooler By Annye Rothenberg Ph.D. www.perfectingparentingpress.com Preschoolers amaze us. They are learning so much so quickly, trying to make sense of the world around them. Preschoolers' conversations are fascinating as they try to piece information together: Looking for the sugar bugs on their teeth after they eat candy. Insisting that Mommy go to time-out when Mommy makes them mad. Explaining that they can't start kindergarten yet because they didn't meet the "dead lion." Preschoolers are also challenging, because they think so differently. They are often oppositional, impulsive, self-centered, inflexible and illogical #150; especially when upset. They have narrow and literal understanding of the meaning of words and figures of speech. Sometimes it seems adults and preschoolers are speaking different languages. Preschoolers' actions and behavior usually make ages two through four the hardest for parents to predict and understand. In a typical situation, we tell our preschooler to clean up his room and he refuses. He argues when he's told he needs to do it because he was the one who made the mess. He insists that it was his 4-month-old baby brother who left everything out. Or he says he can't clean up because his hand is too tired #150; a complaint accompanied by a dramatic collapse on the floor and a plea that you help. You feel confused, annoyed and clueless about what to do. Preschoolers say no to many of our requests and directions. When we insist, they often become defiant and may get stuck in rigidity that they can't get out of on their own. If we get rigid in response #150; "you spilled the water on the floor, so you will clean it up or no TV today" #150; preschoolers' reactions can easily escalate to extreme frustration and anger #150; expressed verbally ("you're a mean, stupid mommy") or physically (hitting parents with the water cup). When they're stuck on "no," we get annoyed with them and threaten them or force them to cooperate. Then the oppositionality that normally recedes by kindergarten gets entrenched in their behavior. But giving in and cleaning up the water ourselves is not the solution, because children must learn not to constantly challenge, disrespect and disregard our authority. We worry about what will happen when they're teenagers if they don't listen now. Here are six important strategies for success: Phrase your directions so they sound fun and/or interesting. "Pretty soon, it's going to be time to make some holes in the paper cup so we can take it in your bath and play." If you can't come up with anything, you can emphasize something he can look forward to doing when he's done brushing his teeth. Or try having his toys "talk" to him: "I don't want to lie on the rug. I want to be in the box with my friends, green and blue Duplos." Preschoolers love that. You only need to do this about half the time. They often can't stop themselves from saying no, but we can help the "no" to dissolve and become a "yes" by making it easy for them to cooperate. It's also important to watch how you phrase your directions to preschoolers. Most parents say something like "How about picking up your toys?" or "Do you want to come inside now?" when it's not really a choice. Preschoolers are so literal that they hear it as a question, which they answer with "no." Phrase it as a fun and/or interesting request, not as a question. When you want your preschoolers to do what you ask, giving advance notice is respectful and effective: "In a little while, it will be time to#133;" It's best to have routines and regular times for dressing, eating, tooth-brushing, toy pickup, TV watching, bed, etc, to reduce continual limit-testing. When there are siblings in the household, spend one-on-one time with your preschooler regularly #150; at least weekly #150; doing something that's fun for both of you. She should know you're doing it just because you enjoy her company. This is like putting money in the bank to draw on when you want her cooperation. Preschoolers need enough sleep at regular times #150; 12 hours for a three-year-old, 11 frac12; hours for a four-year-old, 11 hours for a five-year-old. Falling short by more than an hour is a problem. Insufficient sleep triggers defiant and moody behavior. They also need about an hour a day of heart-pounding exercise (running after a soccer ball, biking, jumping, etc.).Sleep, exercise and regular meals and snacks are essential to enable kids to control themselves better. You can help them develop these important habits. Preschoolers need special handling and understanding. Adapting our approaches to fit their capabilities helps make family life happier and more satisfying. And don't fear that you'll need to "make it fun" forever. As children become kindergarten age, they become more rational and logical, responding to reasoning more often. Preschoolers are delightful and amazing. Enjoy them. Annye Rothenberg, Ph.D., author, has been a child/parent psychologist and a specialist in child rearing and development of young children for more than 25 years. Her parenting psychology practice is in Emerald Hills, California. She is also on the adjunct faculty in pediatrics at Stanford University School of Medicine. Dr. Rothenberg was the founder/director of the Child Rearing parenting program in Palo Alto, California, and is the author of the award-winning book Mommy and Daddy Area Always Supposed to Say Yes #133; Aren't They? For more information about her work, visit www.perfectingparentingpress.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Handling the Interruption Disruption By Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman Do your children interrupt you when you're talking? Does the house seem completely quiet until you pick up the phone, and then your children immediately demand your attention? Have you ever attempted to have an important conversation with your spouse, but the kids couldn't seem to leave you alone? If so, then you're experiencing a common frustration for many parents: the interruption disruption. So what can parents do about this situation? How do we get our children to stop interrupting without sending them the message that we don't want to hear what they have to say? The key to handling the interruption disruption lies in teaching children how and when to speak up. Simply put, if you want a behavior, you have to teach a behavior. Children do not understand when interrupting is or is not appropriate. Nor do they often demonstrate the skills that will enable them to speak up effectively when it is appropriate. They don't understand the power of words and how to use them to create positive change in their lives. To help your children learn to curb the interrupting habit, start with these steps. Step 1 - Create a signal. Before you find yourself in the situation where interrupting occurs, establish a signal or sign that your children can use to let you know they want to talk to you. You might try having them place a hand on your shoulder or touch you gently on the side. These are signals used by many parents. Step 2 - Practice the signal. Practice the signal several times by role-playing before putting it into use. Then have a few of your friends or relatives call you on the telephone when your children are around. See how it works, and debrief as needed. Step 3 - Teach children the difference between important and unimportant reasons to interrupt. Talk to your children about what is and what isn't an acceptable reason to interrupt. One acceptable reason is if someone is hurt or in danger. If your son witnesses a dangerous situation, teach him to communicate it quickly and directly. Give him some starter words that will tip you off that he is communicating potential danger. "Mom, I see danger," "Shannon needs help," or "Trouble alert" work well as clues that danger is at hand. Unless there is immediate danger, inform your children that you will turn your attention to them when a break in the conversation allows. This means that they might have to wait fifteen or twenty seconds after they give you the signal as outlined in step one. Once you feel or see the signal, you don't have to immediately end your discussion and attend to your child. However, fifteen seconds is a long time in the mind of a young child who is working on being patient, so you want to move in that direction quickly. It is important that you practice this scenario, too. If you wait several minutes after getting the signal before you give your child attention, you will sabotage the entire process. Step 4 - Give friendly reminders to encourage use of the signal. Your children will not automatically start using the signal the first time they feel like interrupting. You will need to remind them as they learn this new behavior. "Michael, that's interrupting. Please use the signal we practiced" and "Angel, touch me on the shoulder if you are wanting my attention right now" are examples of ways to encourage a return to signal use. Have patience with this fourth step. Be ready for some misuse and some forgetting of the signal. It is going to take your children time to learn that you have not forgotten them and that you will attend to their need in a timely fashion. Children are used to the world revolving around them, and it is often difficult for them to wait while you meet some of your needs. When they regularly experience having you slowly stop your conversation, attend to their need, and then return to your conversation, they will realize they are still connected to you and that you are still available to them. It may also take time for you to remember to respond to the signal quickly and give appropriate reminders to your children. Keep refining the process until it works smoothly for all concerned. Remember, the end result of your effort is a child who grows into an adult who knows how and when to interrupt. By implementing the above strategies with respect, patience, and understanding we help our children gain skill and confidence when speaking up for themselves. Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are the authors of The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose . They are two of the world's foremost authorities on raising responsible, caring, confident children. They publish a free monthly e-zine for parents. To sign up for it or to obtain more information about how they can help you or your group meet your parenting needs, visit their website today: www.personalpowerpress.com .Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

The Top Three Back to School Tips By Paula Statman www.kidwisecorner.com There are a million back-to-school tips out there and if you try to follow all of them, you'll run yourself ragged before the first day of school. So, I've chosen my top 3. They cover family communication, planning ahead and organizing routines, and safety. Tip #1 This one is a must-do. While you still have a few days before you have to start packing lunches, sit down with your kids individually and ask them, "What can I do to help you have a positive school year? What did we learn from last year that we could repeat or improve upon this year?" Discuss your expectations about grades, friends, behavior, extracurricular activities and anything else that poses a challenge in the coming school term. Address any worries or anxieties they have. They may bring up anything from using the bathroom, to riding the bus, to bullies. Your job is to offer reassure them and have good information handy. Then together schedule future discussion dates on a calendar. Although your kids might protest a little, remember that children appreciate it when their parents stay informed and involved. And these days, given what our kids are dealing with at school, we can't afford not to be. Tip #2 If morning routines have been a source of stress in the past they will likely be again this year. Make up your mind to turn them around once and for all. Organize and streamline early morning tasks and make it clear that everyone must do their fair share. No nagging (you) and no complaining (them). One of the simplest strategies is to do as much as possible the night before. Selecting next day outfits, loading backpacks, and making lunches are all tasks that can be done in advance. If your morning routines are hit and miss, make a solid plan that includes an agreed upon wake up time, showering schedule, and being dressed in time to eat a healthy breakfast. If your kids are young, stickers and charts are good motivators. If they are older and late bedtimes are part of the problem, get a handle on that early in the year. Tip #3 This tip is a combination of proven safety strategies. Your peace of mind about your kids' safety #150; as well as their age and where you live -- has a lot to do with you letting them walk to school. Walking to school as good exercise should be factored in, too. First, rehearse the safety route to school, even if your kids will be walking with adult supervision. Be sure they are prepared with and use good pedestrian safety skills. Take a practice walk or two, noting potential dangers along the way. Find a direct, safe route with crossing guard support, if possible. Be sure they understand and use stop light rules, walk in the crosswalk, and look both ways before crossing. Then, along with those skills, teach them to be aware of their environment and the people in it. Go over how to respond if a stranger approaches them. Don't plant images of scary looking people in their head. Prepare them to act safely if a nice, friendly person asks for help, offers them a ride, or a treat or gift. Also, teach them to stand arm#146;s length from the curb. While having them walk with a buddy is safer, buddies aren#146;t going to be much help unless they are stranger-wise and street-smart. The rule of thumb is if children cannot spot and turn down bribes, it is too soon to let them walk independently. Keep practicing with them until they can. Your goal is gradually help them gain the confidence and skill to navigate safely without you. Paula Statman, M.S.S.W. is an internationally respected educator, speaker and award-winning author. Her practical, positive approach to raising safe and strong children has benefited hundreds of thousands of parents. Paula is a repeat guest on Oprah and the Today Show , has appeared on over 200 radio and television programs, and is featured in publications such as Parents, Child, Redbook, and USA Today.com. The founder and director KidWISE Institute, Paula lives in Oakland, California with her husband and daughter. For more information visit www.kidwisecorner.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Avoiding the Packrat Syndrome By Laura Stack www.TheProductivityPro.com/blog Perhaps your parents said, "Don't throw anything away! Everything has value." And you're still holding on to those beliefs. While necessary during the Great Depression, that type of thinking today will create a society of pack rats who can't throw anything away but desperately need to. The underlying drive behind this behavior is an excessive concern that a given object shouldn't be discarded, as it might be needed later. This behavior can also include excessive acquisition, such as compulsive shopping, extreme collecting, or hoarding free items, such as free newspapers or junk mail. Following the acquisition behavior is extreme indecisiveness about what to keep; the indecisiveness is so extreme that the hoarder completely avoids the decision-making process and ends up keeping everything. Then, the hoarder experiences difficulty figuring out how to best organize all the kept items. Sometimes hoarding behavior becomes severe. Not only can it extend to the office and one's vehicle, but fire marshals have even declared such residences a fire hazard. In one extreme case, a hoarder rented a second apartment to live in because his own had grown too full of belongings. This behavior is more common in men than women. If your behavior is severe -- such as having to create pathways in your home and avoiding having guests -- you can obtain help from a psychologist or psychiatrist. It is not uncommon for compulsive hoarders to also experience tension in all manner of interpersonal relationships, low self-esteem, weak decision-making skills, poor social skills, and even occupational or legal issues. Treatment focuses on sorting items, developing decision-making skills, analyzing unwarranted emotional attachments, and curbing the acquisition of additional possessions. If your symptoms are mild -- in other words, if you're like most people -- the ideas below will help clear your clutter and boost your energy immensely. Unworn clothing, unwanted gifts, ancient paperwork (not needed for tax purposes) -- just get rid of it. If you haven't used it in two years, ditch it. Start a bag or box for charity; keep it in the basement or garage. There are so many worthy causes to choose from: Goodwill, women's organizations, Salvation Army, St. Vincent DePaul, church organizations. Add to your box or bag regularly. When it's full, take it with you to donate when you run errands. Get a receipt each time you drop off a donation for your IRS records. Sell it on eBay. If you don't have an eBay account, set one up on www.ebay.com . Locate all your possessions that have strong resale value -- but are of no use to you whatsoever and are only collecting dust. Take digital photographs of them. International commerce -- what a fun way to get rid of duplicate or unwanted gifts. Turn your junk into money. Write a yard sale date on the calendar. The kids can sell lemonade and get a nice little math lesson about making change, plus a little lesson about earning a profit. Get the neighbors involved, and turn it into a fun multi-household yard sale to boost your profits even more. Donate whatever is left over to a local charity. At the office, keep only one hard copy of final documents. Recycle the rest. If you have a digital version, only keep the paper copy if required by company policy. Be sure to do a daily backup of all your computer files. Keep financial documents only as long as IRS regulations require. For tax returns, that's six years from the filing date. The same holds true for investment purchase and sale records, from the tax filing deadline in the year of sale. Cancelled checks and bank statements should likewise be kept for six years. Shred documents that have become outdated at home and work. Devise a plan to repeat this process at the same time every year; just after the New Year is a great time, when you're in the mindset of making a fresh start. For non-IRS documents at the office, decide how many years that you'll keep things on file. Certain things may have historical value, such as annual reports. But for anything that doesn't possess inherent historical value, get rid of it. You don't need that coffee-stained piece of paper with a rusty paper clip on it. Go through all your files and recycle everything that's now outside your time frame or from the job of the lady who had your office before you. This will also prevent you from having to keep buying more and more filing cabinets, which also helps retain ample space. Again, devise a plan to repeat this process at the same time every year. Look at your possessions through your children's eyes. Pretend what it's going to be like for your children when you pass away and they have to sort through your belongings. Do you really need those love notes from sixth grade? The lock of your mother's baby hair? Keep it. Your grandmother's retro red diva suitcase? Keep it. Do you really need that box of photos from the junior high field trip? You're not even in any of the photos. Your children won't even know who these people are. Do you keep unwanted gifts due to a sense of guilt, simply because they're gifts? Do you have rented storage units to hold all the stuff you never use? Do you have boxes of things in your crawl space you haven't used in years-if you even know what's in there? Worse yet, do you surround yourself with things that make you miserable? Do you keep a "thin section" in your closet? You know-the things you'll wear again once you lose twenty pounds? Every time you look at an item of clothing that doesn't fit, you feel deflated. Your energy plummets as you focus your attention on how fat you are versus finding something attractive that fits your "real" body. Instead, accentuate the positive. There's a reason women burn photographs of their old boyfriends. If you're hoarding tangible proof of emotional baggage, you're sabotaging your energy, not to mention your mood. You're keeping that figurative negativity hovering around your life. Clear the air. Get rid of it. If there's one particle of anger attached to it, get rid of it. Why take up valuable space with outdated physical negativity? Don't keep mementos of failed relationships. If it's a legal issue such as divorce, or custody dispute, keep only the bare minimum of final legal documents that you need. Out with the old, and in with the new. copy; 2008 Laura Stack. Laura Stack ( www.TheProductivityPro.com/blog ) is a motivational speaker who helps busy workers Leave the Office Earlierreg; with Maximum Results in Minimum Time#153;. She is the president of The Productivity Proreg;, Inc., a time management firm specializing in productivity improvement in high-stress organizations. Since 1992, Laura has given presentations on improving output, lowering stress, and saving time in today#146;s workplaces, for companies such as Microsoft, Starbucks, and 3M. She is the bestselling author of The Exhaustion Cure (2008); Find More Time (2006); and Leave the Office Earlier (2004). To have Laura speak at your event, call 303-471-7401. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Bringing New Life to your Lifetime Relationship: 3 Tips for Making Marriage Last Forever By Winn Claybaugh www.beniceorelse.com A good friend once shared the idea that people enter your life for a season, a reason, or a lifetime. A "season relationship" can happen with a new friend you meet on vacation. You have a wonderful time together but once you both head back home, the relationship is over. A "reason relationship" occurs with an individual who enters your life to teach you something, through either a good or a not-so-good experience. "Lifetime relationships" last a lifetime, plain and simple. Divorce statistics notwithstanding, marriage is still intended to be a lifetime relationship. Unless you categorize your marriage as a lifetime relationship, you risk missing out on something that could provide growth and love and serve both you and your spouse for many years to come. To make your marriage the lifetime relationship it's meant to be, you must constantly seek to grow and improve it. Unless you interject new beliefs, habits, and practices into your marriage, it can become old, boring, or stagnant. Here are three ideas for bringing new life to your lifetime relationship. Think Back Think back to all those wonderful, romantic things you used to do for your spouse or partner while dating. I believe that if everyone continued to do those things, we wouldn't have the divorce rate in this country that we do. I find it very interesting that when people have an affair, they start doing all those romantic, wonderful things with the "new" person in their life. Just imagine what would happen if they went home and did those things with their spouse instead. Write a Gratitude Letter What are you grateful for in your life? What events do you want to remember? There's something quite profound and empowering about making a list or writing a story about what's right in your life. When you stop to think about the good things in life, you'll feel nicer and be nicer, which will make you a nicer and better spouse. Your gratitude letter can begin with a mention of the most obvious things you're grateful for, such as family and friends. You could write about the gifts of your heart, mind, and soul; your worldly possessions; and your personal discoveries, benchmarks, and growth. You may even want to express gratitude for a painful experience that helped you be a better person or appreciate your family more. Write your gratitude letter, and acknowledge the experience and lessons you've been given in life. It's Never Too Late Journaling and letter writing are powerful ways to express thoughts, beliefs, and intentions of the heart. I believe it was author and speaker Marianne Williamson who taught me that it only takes one person to make the shift in a relationship that has gotten off track. Even if the other person decides not to participate, the work that you do to make your apologies, forgive yourself, and express your love and gratitude can be all that is required to proclaim, "That relationship is healed. I can now move forward with peace, love, and resolve." Winn Claybaugh is the author of Be Nice (Or Else!) and "one of the best motivational speakers in the country," according to CNN's Larry King. A business owner for over 25 years with over 8,000 people in his organization, Winn is the co-owner of hair care giant Paul Mitchell's school division. Winn has helped thousands of businesses build their brands and create successful working cultures. His clients include Southwest Airlines, the Irvine Company, Vidal Sassoon, Entertainment Tonight, Mattel, For Rent magazine, Structure/Limited/Express, and others. Winn is a frequent guest on national radio and a regular contributor to online publications. Visit www.BeNiceOrElse.com to sign up for his free monthly Be Nice (Or Else!) newsletter Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Bacteria Risks and Pregnancy By Dr. Alan Greene www.drgreene.com There are certain microscopic bacteria that can pose special health risks to pregnant women and to their babies. Although most people can safely eat food containing a type of bacteria called Listeria , pregnant women are ten times more likely to get sick if they eat those same foods. And if they do get sick, the infection can be devastating for the baby. The tricky thing about Listeria is that, unlike many bacteria, they can thrive at refrigerator temperatures. To be sure, ensure your partner avoids the following: Soft cheeses such as Brie, Camembert, feta, and Mexican queso fresco, or any cheeses with blue veins. Most hard cheeses are fine, as are pasteurized cream cheese, cottage cheese, cheese spreads, sliced cheese and yogurt. Foods from deli counters (prepared salads, meats, and cheeses), unless they are heated to steaming right before eating. Hot dogs, packaged cold cuts, meat spreads, pate, smoked seafood, and leftovers, unless they are heated to steaming right before eating. Canned or shelf-stable products are generally fine. Raw or unpasteurized milk during pregnancy, including goat's milk, and foods that contain unpasteurized milk. Raw and partially cooked eggs, meat, and poultry can harbor other unwanted visitors. In addition to Listeria , be cautious about E. coli , salmonella , and Toxoplasma by doing the following: Cook ground beef until no pink is visible, and be sure pork and lamb are well done. For turkey or other poultry, cook thoroughly to 180deg; F (with a thermometer). Cook eggs until both the whites and the yolks are firm. Soft scrambled eggs aren't a pregnancy treat. Remember hidden sources of raw or partially cooked eggs, such as cookie dough, unpasteurized eggnog and Hollandaise sauce. You've heard not to change kitty litter during pregnancy to avoid Toxoplasma. This is good advice, but pregnant women can also pick up Toxoplasma from unpasteurized milk and undercooked meats. Be sure milk is pasteurized and meats are cooked to at least 150 degrees F. Even if cooked food is safe, microorganisms can still live on hands or utensils while cooking. Wash before and after handling raw foods. Always wash cutting boards, kitchen surfaces and utensils after use. Dr Alan Greene, author of Raising Baby Greene , is a graduate of Princeton University and the University of California San Francisco. He is a Clinical Professor at Stanford University's Packard Children's Hospital. In addition to being the founder of www.DrGreene.com , he is the Chief Medical Officer of A.D.A.M., and the Pediatric Expert for WebMD. He is the Chairman of the Board of The Organic Center and on the Advisory Board of Healthy Child Healthy World. Dr Greene appears frequently on TV, radio, websites, and in print including appearances on The Today Show, Fox and Friends, The Wall Street Journal, Parents Magazine, and More >>

School is in Session and the Bully is Back By Derek Randel www.stoppingschoolviolence.com School started this week. As the Sanders ate dinner, Rick just moved his food around without eating. The nine-year-old looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. His parents knew something was wrong, but he just kept repeating, "nothing is wrong" to all their questions. At bedtime, he finally let out what was bothering him. The same four boys from last year started bullying him again. The Sanders were very lucky that Rick told them what was happening because most students will not tell their parents. Most students are worried about being retaliated against, humiliated even more, and how their parents will react. The Sanders have built a relationship around communication so Rick knew his parents wouldn't go ballistic. As a former teacher, I have seen parents handle these situations in many different ways. Most are expectedly upset and emotional, but coming into the school blaming, threatening, or accusing the staff is not the way to get results. You can expect your child to tell you not to contact the school because he thinks it will make the situation worse. However, you are your child's advocate and it may be necessary to contact the school. What is most important is to go into the school and let them know there is a problem. You need to work with the school staff since you're on the same side. Working together instead of attacking each other will work much better and will be easier for your child Here are six important steps to follow whenever approaching the school about bullying: Document each bullying incident. Look at it this way#151; if it is not documented, then it didn't happen. Include helpful information such as when, where, and who. Your child needs to keep this record if he expects it to stop. Contact your child's teacher even if you're asked not to. You do not have to tell your child you did this. If you cannot go in the school, then call or email him/her. There is a chance that he/she is completely unaware of what is happening. Being calm, supply the teacher with your information. Contact the school's administrative office in writing if you're not satisfied with how the situation is being handled. Request a meeting to discuss your documents. When meeting with the administration, ask for a written copy of what was discussed. Schools will usually tell you that they cannot discuss the discipline of another student with you, but still document what transpired in the meeting. If your child is being bullied, then it is obvious that what is being done is not working. Continue going up the ladder to the superintendent and school board. Too many children are being bullied without anyone getting involved. Everyday 160,000 students do not go to school because they are intimidated. This is unacceptable. Don't quit if you're not satisfied; see an attorney if needed. You can also contact the police about filing charges against the bully and then follow this by contacting the media. Too many students consider school a living hell because they are being bullied. Being a victim can lead to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and much more. If you do not receive the desired results to end the bullying, then another option is to pull your child out of that school. You can pull your child from a public school at any time. Consider all options for their education, but keep in mind that all students need to feel wanted, safe, and successful. Derek Randel is a parent coach who speaks nationally on how to remove the yelling from your home and how to protect your child/student from bullying and school violence. Derek has been seen on many television shows and is heard on radio shows around the country. He is the author of Stopping School Violence and was nominated for a Disney American Teacher Award. He also is a certified stepfamily coach through the Step-Family Foundation. For more information visit www.stoppingschoolviolence.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Use Nature to Boost Your Child's Learning By Mark Stevens www.luisasnature.com Nature can play a big role in helping your children advance their learning. There are many activities you can do with your child to help him or her mentally and emotionally grow during the outdoor season. Exploring parks and nature preserves, travel, and observing plant and vegetable growth in your own garden are excellent ways for children to expand their minds and learn about life. Exploring parks and nature preserves Get out on the path or trail with your children and see just how many plants, birds, and other growth and animals they can discover. Parks and preserves are usually great places for bird watching. Have your kids use their ears to detect the birds' location, for example. Once they spot a particular bird, have them note the different characteristics they observe: eating habits, color, song, twitching tail, type of flight. On another outing, you can ask your children to choose a tree and note the growth and insects that rely on its bark. What kind of leaves does the tree have? Is it tall and thin or wide and short? Does it bear fruit? If there is a river or ocean nearby, is it low or high tide? What color is the water? What is lurking in or near the water or in the nearby woods? Traveling through nature While on the road with your kids, talk to them about what they see outside the car windows. Take turns pointing out something in the landscape. Once this exercise gets tiring, don#146;t just give up and watch your kids play video games for the rest of the trip. Put an audio book in your car#146;s CD player and let your minds paint a picture of the action and setting that your ears take in. You can then discuss those stories just as you would any goodnight story you read to your children. Sharing nature through your observances from the car and taking in an audio story or two together not only promotes learning, it also strengthens the family bond. Observing plant and vegetable growth in your own garden Growing a garden with your children gives them a lesson in nature and in understanding where our food comes from. Why do we till the soil? What tools do we need? Plants need water just like we do. Talk about that and about the many other aspects of gardening with your children. What characteristics does each of the vegetable plants have? Why do the bees fly to the blossoms? Let your children practice their math skills: number of plants, different plant species in the garden, branches on individual plants, weeds remaining to be removed. Teach your children about the benefit of using compost in the garden. Lead the way to your children's learning experience in nature. Before long, they#146;ll be pulling you off the couch with their green thumbs. Mark J. Stevens, author of LUISA'S NATURE (Wyatt-MacKenzie Publishing, Spring 2008), is a news journalist currently working in Europe. Fluent in French, Spanish, and German, he has enjoyed extensive travel much of his life. Shaped by the rural New Jersey setting of his youth, Mark continues to explore the richness of nature with his wife and two children on the outskirts of Munich, Germany. He also belongs to several parenting and nature organizations in the U.S. and Europe. For more information, visit www.luisasnature.com . Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>

Dr. Greene's Top Parenting Dos and Don'ts By Alan Greene, MD www.DrGreene.com Each day I see parents trying their best to do what's right for their families, but no one has the perfect guidebook that tells parents what to do. Here are the top eight solvable problems that I advise parents to remedy today. Do#133; Have confidence in your parenting style. Don't#133; Worry about what your parents or the neighbors or your child's teacher thinks about your parenting style. Create a parenting style that makes you comfortable and relax. Do#133; Create an exercise program for yourself. Don't#133; Skip it because you don't have the time. Kids follow our example. If we're not exercising, they won't learn to either. So take care of yourself and teach your kids to do the same. Do#133; Take the time to create healthy love foods for your family. Don't#133; Settle routinely for food isn't helping them build a strong body and mind. What children eat is vitally important and the foods they learn to love when young will often be their favorites as adults. You can create healthy love foods for them by what you feed them now and give them a life-long gift. Do#133; Give your kids a good multi-vitamin each day. Don't#133; Trust our food sources to provide all the nutrients kids need. Most kids don't eat 5 servings of fruits and veggies a day. Even if they did (and I do encourage at least that many) our food's nutrient density has gone down. Kids need a good multi-vitamin each day to round out their nutritional needs. Do#133; Stay consistent with your rules. Don't#133; Let whining wear you down. If you want a child to sleep in her own bed, then letting her sleep in your bed "just this once" is going to make it much harder later. Do#133; Think about the things that matter. Don't#133; Pick the wrong things to worry about. You need to pay close attention to some things, like your kids' safety. But don't sweat the small stuff even if it means your kids sleep in their street clothes instead of pajamas. Do#133; Take advantage of today. Don't#133; Wait until tomorrow to build life-long memories. Time flies. Plan something every season that your kids will look forward to year after year. Do#133; Pay attention to both your perspective and your child's. Don't#133; Lose sight of your needs or theirs. If we focus too much on whatever children want, or too much on what we want, they miss out on learning both to give and receive. Dr. Alan Greene, author of Raising Baby Greene , is a graduate of Princeton University and the University of California San Francisco. In addition to being the founder of www.DrGreene.com , he is the Chief Medical Officer of A.D.A.M. He is the Chair of The Organic Center and on the Advisory Board of Healthy Child Healthy World. Dr. Greene appears frequently on TV, radio, websites, and in print including appearances on The Today Show, Good Morning America, Fox and Friends, The Wall Street Journal, Parents Magazine, and US Weekly. Dr. Greene is Clinical Professor of Pediatrics at Stanford University's Packard Children's Hospital. Permission granted for use on DrLaura.com. More >>